The Kwaj Drafter!

Vacation is finally here!

2011-10-26T07:59:00.000+12:00

Well, here I am in the wonderful Land of the Round Doorknobs enjoying a well-deserved 'parole' - ahem, vacation - from the rock!

Flew out on Continental 172 on Monday, October 10 via Majuro to Honolulu, getting in at around 3:00 am local time (they sure know how to pad them flight times, don't they? ETA was 3:30 Honolulu time. Had the opportunity of using the Global Entry kiosk at immigration and processing was quick and painless (completed processing back in March). Scan passport, place hand on biometric reader, answer a few questions and you're pre-cleared. Just show the ticket from the kiosk at immigration and customs and you're done.

Got out at the curb in front of arrivals around 4:00 am and waited to meet a friend of mine from CAP Hawaii Wing so we could chow down on some early-morning grindz at Byron's (a diner not far from the airport that's open 24 hours). Back to the airport to check in for the flight to the mainland; after a five-hour flight to Los Angeles and a quick connection, I finally got into Las Vegas at around 5:15 pm local time. I was jetlagged, exhausted and in pain suffering from a boil in my backside. Got it taken care of a day later at the local hospital (I had begun to see the docs on Kwaj for treatment and they were considering sending me to Honolulu for treatment but I was able to convince them to get the work done while in Vegas.)

Early on the morning of the 15th, I flew from Vegas to Montgomery, Alabama via Atlanta to attend CAP National Staff College at Maxwell AFB. It was a busy week, with little free time, but an in-depth course on how CAP works at the national level. It's said that the future crop of wing and region commanders are selected from NSC graduates. Not that I'm holding my breath... The banquet and graduation ceremony was held at the historic Maxwell AFB Officers' Club; for many (including myself) it was an opportunity to sport our recently-purchased mess dress uniforms. The uniform is optional but it is an unwritten rule in CAP for field-grade officers (major and above) to own one if they meet CAP weight and grooming standards. Below is a picture of yours truly sporting mess dress:

Back home to Vegas on Saturday, October 22, arriving late in the afternoon. A few more days in Vegas and then my mom and I board a flight to Honolulu for the last four days of my vacation. On the day I return to Kwaj, Mom returns to Vegas.

Less than one month before parole!

2011-09-30T09:03:00.000+12:00

Less than one month to go before I board Continental 172 and fly to the mainland for a well-deserved vacation! Paid for my extra legroom and Economy+ upgrades (though I was unable to get Economy+ seating on the Honolulu-Los Angeles-Las Vegas leg of the flight - things may change as I get closer to flight time, and I might be able to snag one on the day of the flight) and for the premier line upgrade (I get to go through the first class/premier boarding instead of the cattle-car boarding call). Considering I'm going to be in the air or waiting at the airport for connections for nearly 18 hours, it's well worth the extra expense.
Morale and quality of life is sinking further... the latest cuts to our quality of life are the elimination of the work bus service to the technical areas (where I work) and reduction of the hours of operation of the Small Boat Marina. While we've been promised higher-speed DSL internet, I'm still skeptical about it; I'll believe it when I see it offered. The costs ain't gonna be cheap; for the maximum bandwidth offered we're expected to pay around $150 a month for the service. And it's nowhere near as fast as what one is used to on the mainland and Hawaii. Even Ebeye (yes, the 'slum of the Pacific') already enjoys high speed internet. I wouldn't be surprised if people (especially us BQ rats) got together and split the cost of the internet connection.

It's a constant battle between the haves (families in housing) and the have nots (the BQ residents); and the biggest irritant are the 'island fluff' who contribute little or nothing but expect everything. The powers-that-be (and their cheerleaders) always come up with the same retort: "if you don't like it here, leave - six flights off the rock every week!" Most of us here are making the best out of life in this rock out in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere while muttering under our breath the mantra the military knows so well: IHTFP (I Hate This Fucking Place). And they ask us why we drink? Now that the vitriol is vented, I feel much better. Island life will have its ups and downs, and while I occasionally will complain I don't plan on pulling the loud handle anytime soon.

Put my money down to start taking scuba lessons after I come back from vacation. One more item off my Kwaj bucket list. I've yet to go sailing or spend an overnight trip to Bigej Island.

Shopping on the rock

2011-09-03T13:26:00.000+12:00

Because of our remote location out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, we don't have the luxury of getting in our cars and driving to the nearest shopping mall or eatery.('Cause we can't own cars on Kwaj, and they don't float!)

AAFES (Army and Air Force Exchange Service) is the primary retail establishment on the island. Before they came on island the retail stores were operated by the contractor (KRS). Because of the size of the population, there isn't much of a selection and it took AAFES a couple of years of growing pains to get into the swing of things. They're improving, but you'll always have a cynical vocal minority on the rock that bitch just to hear themselves bitch. A new general manager for the AAFES operation just took over a couple of months ago, and he's making great strides in listening to the customers and improving stock. Within the rank and file staff the 'ainokea' (Hawaiian pidgin for 'I don't care') attitude is a lot less pervasive but still needs some more work.

Recently, policies were changed to reduce the number of Marshallese shopping days and the total dollar amounts Marshallese workers on the island could purchase. When AAFES began operations here, Marshallese could shop every Saturday and could spend up to $250 to buy food and other items at the PX. PXtra and Shoppette. Naturally, it was the big moneymaker for AAFES. After complaints from the local merchants on Ebeye, who claimed that Marshallese workers were shopping on Kwaj instead of locally, which was hurting their business. (And there's a thriving black market of illegally-resold exchange goods at some stores on Ebeye.) In July, new restrictions were imposed on the Marshallese workers for shopping days. Shopping is every other Saturday on payday week until December 31, then it reduces even further to only twice a year after that. (Under KRS retail, that same twice-a-year policy existed as well.) It does hurt the bottom line for AAFES, and I wouldn't be surprised if changes will be made to adjust to the reduced shopping income.

For the military, DoD civilians and contractors on island, online shopping at the restricted AAFES website is allowed, and our common access cards (CAC) allow unlimited exchange and commissary privileges at the brick and mortar stores overseas and on the mainland. I've never had a problem shopping AAFES online, nor have I had a purchase or admission to the store denied when shopping at the exchanges at Hickam or Nellis AFB while on leave.

Our commissary - supermarket for you silly-vilians - is known as Surfway. (Old-time Kwajies will remember that it was originally called Safeway but the big supermarket chain objected, forcing the name change. Before AAFES came to the island, the downtown stores were known as Macy's (shortened from 'Macy's of the Marshalls', dating back from post WWII days), Macy's West and Ten-Ten (after its original hours of operation: 10 am to 10 pm). Unlike the PX and Shoppette downtown, Marshallese workers are not allowed to shop at Surfway. Again, Surfway just hired on a new manager, and he's doing his best to improve the selection and quality of items sold there, considering the long and easily broken supply lines to the island.

And if you can't find it on island, your last and best option is to shop online. However, some online retailers will not ship to APOs, primarily because they use UPS or Fedex to ship their goods.(We don't get UPS nor Fedex out here on Kwaj.). For an extra fee, one can use an APO/FPO package forwarding service like ShipItAPO; they receive the package and reship it using the U.S. mail. Delivery times vary, since most mail that is handled through the APO/FPO military mail system is space available on military and civilian contract cargo aircraft. Packages mailed from Hawaii and the west coast of the mainland USA can get here in about a week or less, depending if the package makes it to the pallet at the military mail handling facility (San Francisco, Los Angeles or Honolulu, for us); other locations take as much as 2-3 weeks. Occasionally, packages get misrouted to another APO/FPO, so that sometimes adds to the delay as your package gets shuffled around the world.

The APO/FPO mail is not supposed to be used for personal gain; occasionally you get a private vendor who gets busted trying to skirt around the regulations. There have been occasions where an individual has had their mail privileges suspended or revoked for misusing the mailbox, and their packages returned to sender. Pour encourager les autres...

For heavier items and items that are for resale, some will elect to get them shipped using the barge. The package is delivered to the KRS offices in San Leandro, California or Honolulu, Hawaii (with prior permission) and loaded onto a container ship that stops in Honolulu, Guam and is then transferred to the barge M/V Islander for delivery to Kwaj. This journey takes approximately 60 days to complete.

The reduction of the Marshallese shopping days has already hit AAFES hard... by October the main PX moves into the PXtra, leaving the main building open as a concessionnaire's mall. Some of the island vendors have already moved from their old location in the Mic Shop. The quality of life on the island is eroding dail, and it's already showing on many long-time Kwaj residents.

The Labor Day weekend is upon us again and we're making preparations for the Mongolian BBQ at the Vets' Hall on Sunday. Since reintroducing it last year it's become a popular event and a great fundraiser for the post. Yours truly gets to start making the sauces Saturday night after work and early Sunday morning... and once it's done I'm making a beeline for the nearest bar!

Two years on Kwajalein!

2011-08-16T13:42:00.000+12:00

Where did all the time go? It seems like yesterday - and not two years ago - that I got off a plane into an island paradise in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere! It's the experience of a lifetime, and I'm enjoying every minute of it.

August 15th, 2011 (the 14th for you mainlanders on the other side of the date line) completes my initial two year employment contract with KRS; from this point forward I'm on 'rolling 90s'. As long as the company wants me, I'm here for the long run.

On the other hand, layoff notices were handed out on Friday. Budget cuts hit us pretty hard (18% more than the cuts last year), and my department wasn't spared. My coworker got his notice. I don't know how many got the chop; the 'coconut wireless' is rife with speculation. The transition to Huntsville apparently is on again; but when that will happen I have no idea. As long as we get enough notice and the relocation package is decent, I'll up and move when the time comes.

Got my acceptance letter to CAP National Staff College and completed all my travel arrangements. And I have a bunch of preparation reading to do before mid-October!

Sunday was a fun-filled day. In the afternoon I participated in a 'hash'. Before you, gentle reader, go off half-cocked, it isn't THAT illegal drug - it's a 'drinking club with a running/walking problem'! (Click on the link for more information.) While I didn't run, I manned one of the 'beer check stations'. The participants searched all over the island for the strategically placed beer stops, and none could continue until all had checked in. After all stations were located, the hash ended with the traditional circle ceremony. Good fun was had by all. (There used to be a Kwajalein Hash House Harrier chapter years ago, but it apparently died out; perhaps this hash might start up the tradition again!)

In the evening, the post had its steak dinner. For $20, ticket holders got a tasty steak (you grill it and season it to taste), baked potato and toppings, vegetable, dessert and a non-alcoholic drink. As are most outside food events on Kwaj, the event sold out quickly. And now to get ready for the Mongolian BBQ event, being held on Labor Day weekend. (Yours truly gets to make the sauces again.)

Our watering holes...

2011-07-21T10:26:00.000+12:00

If you've been following my blog for the past couple of years you've already heard me mention two of the most important places to unwind on the rock: Veterans' Hall (aka Vets' Hall) and the Ocean View Club (aka 'The Snake Pit'). (With an honorable mention to the boat shacks and the late, lamented Yokwe Yuk Club.)

The Ocean View Club (aka 'The Snake Pit')

You can tell a Kwaj newbie or a TDY'er who's never been to Kwaj when they refer to this 'bucket o' blood' by its official name, the Ocean View Club. Kwaj residents refer to it as 'The Snake Pit' or simply 'The Pit'. It is one of the oldest buildings still standing from World War II days (only the Island Memorial Chapel and the Richardson Theatre are older, but not by much). Back when the Navy ruled the island this was the enlisted men's club. (Building 241, now the USAKA commander's quarters and later the Yokwe Yuk club was the officers' club.)

Some of you may wonder how the nickname 'The Snake Pit' stuck. Legend has it that it was named after a popular movie of the time, 'The Snake Pit', in which the lead character (Olivia deHavilland) finds herself in an insane asylum and can't remember how she got there. Applying Kwaj logic, it's a place where you can't remember how you got home! (Cheap beer and booze served in copious amounts...) After the Yokwe Yuk club closed down in Halloween 2008, the Pit became the only after-hours bar open seven days a week. It's centrally located on the east end of 'Beautiful Downtown Kwaj' on Ocean Drive, within stumbling - ahem, walking - distance from the BQs. Those riding their bikes in an advanced state of intoxication are strongly advised not to do so, lest they become a target for Kwaj Five-O and a public intoxication charge. (The hospital is across the street from the Pit, so the inevitable scrapes and cuts caused by falling off a bike can be treated. (And the treatment is worse: wounds must be painfully scrubbed out to avoid infection or possibly the growth of coral.)

From the time the Snake Pit opens at 1630 (4:30 pm for you unrepentant silly-vilians) until the last ferry leaves for Ebeye at 2200 (10:00 pm) Marshallese workers coming off their workshifr frequent the bar. Actually, they have 90 minutes after their work shift ends - unless extended by their supervisor or given special permission to stay overnight - to leave the island or risk a trespassing charge. Needless to say, some Marshallese patrons use that 'window' to power-drink cheap beer and liquor in rapid succession, which leads to more than a few getting wasted and getting in fights on the ferry, if they don't pass out between the Pit and the DSC. (Alcohol sales are strictly controlled on Ebeye; one must purchase an alcohol permit at the KALGov (Kwajalein Atoll Local Government) police station in order to purchase alcohol (at steep prices) over on Ebeye.) The Pit closes at 2300 (11:00 pm) Monday through Friday and 0200 (2:00 am) on Saturdays and Sundays. Kwaj Five-O strictly enforces the rule.

In olden days the Snake Pit used to have a kitchen that served pupus to drunk and hungry bar patrons (budget cuts and neglected maintenance eventually closed it); on most Sunday nights the catering department of Retail Sales furnishes a couple of trays of pupus; other nights you'll have to get to the snack bar before it closes or suffer by eating bags of chips or peanuts sold at the bar. (A test project initiated by AAFES now extends pizza delivery by Anthony's Pizza until midnight on Saturdays and Sundays. We're hoping it becomes permanent.)

Veterans' Hall

Home to the only known American Legion post currently meeting within a military installation (Richard B. Anderson Memorial Post No. 44) Vets' Hall is on Lagoon Road as it makes the turn towards the technical areas on Kwaj. Unlike the Snake Pit which is open daily, Vets' Hall is only open to the Kwaj community three nights a week: Friday (1630-2400), Saturday (1630-0200) and Sunday (1900-2400). The other nights are reserved only for active members of American Legion Post 44 and their guests.

Full bartender service is available on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, while 'honor bar' is observed on member-only nights. (For those unfamiliar, money is dropped into a lock box at the bar to cover any drinks purchased.)

Unlike the Snake Pit, Vets' Hall has a fuller - and better - selection of beers and liquors. They only take cash, no plastic. Active American Legion members may run a tab, payable at the end of the month. A covered patio keeps the customers away from the rain showers that pop up almost daily. Vets' Hall is considered a private club, though the shell of the building belongs to Uncle Sam. A full kitchen allows the hall to host special meal nights such as steak nights and the Mongolian BBQ. Members (including myself) may use the kitchen to cook their own meals.

So, which one's better? It depends on the person. Some like the convenience of the Snake Pit, within stumbling distance of the BQs. Others don't mind the 10-minute bike ride to Vets' Hall.

Looking back at nearly two years on 'The Rock'

2011-06-23T13:49:00.000+12:00

It's hard to believe that nearly two years ago (August 15, 2009) I first set foot on Kwajalein Atoll as a 'Kwaj newbie'. Fast forward two years later (or if you're bored, read the blog entries from the beginning) and you can see how I've enjoyed my time here in 'paradise - in the middle of nowhere'. Sure, life here has had its ups and downs but you just can't beat the experience. I've already signed my paperwork to extend on 'rolling 90s' and I'm looking forward to going on vacation in October and attending CAP National Staff College. (The application was approved and endorsed up the chain of command and I'm just waiting on notification from the NSC staff by late July or August.)

Occasionally the swift application of military justice (this IS a restricted military installation, even though the uniformed military presence here is minimal) here causes more than a few raised eyebrows within the community. While contractors are not subject to the UCMJ (Uniform Code of Military Justice), a bar order imposed by the commander can swiftly end an employee's career on Kwaj, depending on its severity. Most everyone out here minds their P's and Q's, but occasionally some people just don't listen or learn. The commander is the ultimate authority on the island and his (or her - there was a female commander a few years ago) word is law. Our infrastructure may be crumbling and our quality of life may be suffering, but if it wasn't for the sense of community here and the many friends I've made over the past two years I wouldn't have considered extending my contract. People may come and go, but the Kwaj experience lives forever.

Planning for vacation... again!

2011-06-12T18:33:00.000+12:00

Planning for the second half of my annual leave in October. On August 14, I hit the two-year mark and complete my initial contract, then enter into 'rolling 90s'. On your anniversary date, KRS awards the value of a round-trip ticket from Kwajalein to Honolulu (currently at about $1200), plus another $1500 to complete your travel round-trip to your point of origin (home of record). Additionally, five days of 'administrative days' (paid time off that does not carry over, unlike accrued PTO) and four days of 'travel days' (two on the way out, two on the way back; if your home of record is Hawaii, Guam or the Marshall Islands, you only get two) are added to your vacation bank. The two-year mark also gives you more hours of PTO accrued every two weeks, from 4.62 in your first two years to 5.23.

Until I receive notice of when the dates are for CAP National Staff College I can't finalize my vacation plans. Traditionally, it's held in mid-October at Maxwell AFB in Montgomery, Alabama. Here's a brief description:

National Staff College (NSC) is the capstone course in professional development. It is designed for members who are, or will be, assuming positions of regional or national importance within CAP.

This college is by invitation only from your wing commander and is limited in enrollment to CAP majors or higher grade. This college is organized by national headquarters and lasts eight days, held at Maxwell Air Force Base in beautiful Montgomery, Alabama. Fewer than 2,500 of all senior members have reached this demanding level of professional development. Are you up to the challenge?

NSC is taught by senior CAP leaders and USAF instructors from Air University, the curriculum challenges students in the areas of executive leadership, management, organizational behavior, and policy formulation. Much time is spent examining CAP's national-level operations. Students engage in seminar discussions, case studies, and exercises throughout the seven day course.

Because of the graduate-level design of NSC, as well as its focus on national-level operations, attendance at National Staff College is restricted to those members who hold the grade of Major (or above), who have completed CAP's Region Staff College (or equivalent), and who have the endorsement of their wing commander.

(CAP grade of Major, got it already; Region Staff College, did it in 2009, 'Wing King's' endorsement, shouldn't be a problem.) Once I complete NSC, I will have completed all requirements for Level V of the CAP professional development program and will earn the Gill Robb Wilson award. (It's the senior member equivalent of the cadet program's General Carl A. Spaatz award - which I never earned as a cadet; I topped off at the Amelia Earhart award and the grade of cadet major, way back when dinosaurs roamed the earth.)

It's going to be a complicated trip plan: Kwajalein to Honolulu, then from Kwajalein to Las Vegas. After a couple of days in Vegas, then to Birmingham, Alabama (it's actually cheaper to fly there than Montgomery), then drive the 100 or so miles to Maxwell AFB. Eight days there and then do the trip in reverse, staying almost a week in back in Vegas before flying back to Honolulu. A couple of days there and then back to Kwajalein. If I plan it well, I could rack up some serious frequent flyer miles on Continental - ahem - United!

Back to more current events... Saturday was the annual PLOPS (PLans and OPerationS) picnic (my department on Kwaj) at the Kwajalein Yacht Club. Yours truly helped out cooking the burgers and hot dogs on the grill - and I was dead-tired at the end of the day. After a brief stop at the Vets' Hall for a beer, I walked back to the BQ, where I promptly crashed out on my bed. Of course, it's karaoke night at the Snake Pit tonight.

Memorial Day Weekend 2011

2011-06-07T10:20:00.000+12:00

After a drought of long weekend holidays from February (Presidents' Day) until now we have finally arrived at the Memorial Day weekend. While it's traditionally touted as the first weekend of the summer holiday season that ends on Labor Day in September, first and foremost we should always remember the reason why Memorial Day was created: to commemorate those who have paid the ultimate sacrifice in battle.

Remembering that we work Tuesday through Saturday we observe the long weekend on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. I officially was installed as American Legion Post 44 adjutant on Friday and began in earnest my new duties.

On Tuesday, I wore my Civil Air Patrol uniform to the Memorial Day ceremony. Nobody complained, and those who asked questions were given straight explanations, including the garrison commander, COL Gaines. I wore the soon-to-be obsolete blue corporate uniform (last wear date is December 31, 2011).

Soon as the ceremony ended, I returned to the Vets' Hall and changed from my CAP uniform to my grilling uniform, since I was helping cook. The lunch we put out for the military and veterans was very busy, with throngs of kids chowing down on burgers and dogs. (And the inevitable 'Kwaj moochers' who constantly crash parties for the free food showed up as well.) I finally got to go home about 5:30 pm, once things were cleaned up. I'm a little irked that some pulled a disappearing act to dodge the clean up. But I'm not one to complain, just finish it the best you can and drive on.

Wednesday was the beginning of the 'short week' following the holiday, as the Class of 2011 of Kwajalein Junior-Senior High gets ready to graduate on Friday. That evening, one of our Vets' Hall volunteers, relaxing at the Snake Pit after work got ambushed by a Marshallese who apparently doesn't like haoles telling him what to do because he's the son-in-law of the Queen of Ebeye. (Marshallese have a strict class and social structure: at the top are the landowners, who hold the money, land and power, then the tribal chiefs, and finally the raggedy-assed masses who barely scratch out a living.) So here's the story as it unfolded; I won't place names here for their privacy; those of us here know their identities and are personal friends.

After telling the bartender to turn down the loudly playing Marshallese music several times, the guy finally went up to the bar and turned it down. Shortly afterward the Marshallese guy went off on our guy, sucker punching him and kicking him while he was down on the ground. A couple of other guys tried breaking up the fight but the Marshallese guy kept coming after him. The bartender failed to call 911 to summon KPD - many of the other Marshallese froze in their tracks and did nothing, probably out of a possible fear of retaliation from a member of royalty when the folks got back to Ebeye. Eventually KPD broke up the fight, sent the assailant to jail and the victim to the ER. The assailant had just come off of a lengthy island bar; he was immediately slapped with an immediate 7-year bar from Kwajalein; I would not be surprised if it becomes a bar for life. And I hope - many of us who know the victim feel the same way - that he gets prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Fighting on Kwaj happens rarely; next to crossing the runway, fighting is second in earning a window or aisle seat off the rock.Most of them are drunken brawls but the rare one I described above does occur.

In other news on the rock, the Marshallese worker community is up in arms over new shopping day restrictions. Previously, C-badge workers were entitled to shop at the BX and shoppette every Saturday, as long as purchases didn't include alcohol or tobacco or exceeded $250 in one day per badged person. Effective July 1, shopping days are reduced to payday Saturdays and the amount is now $125. Beginning January 1, Marshallese shopping days are further reduced to two a year, which was the standard before AAFES came on island in 2008. The main complaint was lodged by some Ebeye merchants who cried foul over black marketeering cutting into their profits. (- cough - BULLSHIT! - cough - They're just as guilty, too.)

I wouldn't be surprised if the Marshallese workers get barred from the Snake Pit. Currently, workers have a 90-minute window after pau hana (end of the work day) to depart Kwajalein back to Ebeye, unless an extension is granted by their supervisor or special arrangements to stay overnight in Kwaj are made. Violators who overstay their window get cited for trespassing. Accumulate too many trespassing citations, and one faces a bar from the island. As it is right now, many of the workers make a beeline for the Pit and slam down as many cheap beers before they have to depart Kwaj. I wouldn't be surprised if the 90-minute window gets cut back or eliminated altogether.

Look at all these rumors...

2011-05-26T14:40:00.000+12:00

"How do rumors get started, they're started by the jealous people and
They get mad seein' somethin' they had and somebody else is holdin'..." - The Timex Social Club, 'Rumors' (1986)

Call it what you want - the 'coconut wireless', 'RUMINT' (RUMor INTtelligence), 'latrine-o-grams', 'scuttlebutt', etc. etc. and so forth - rumors are a way of life here on Kwajalein. With the exception of classified information (which carries stiff penalties for unauthorized disclosure) there are very few personal secrets on this rock. From predictions of future doom-and-gloom in Fiscal Year 2012 to the latest marital indiscretions of certain couples on the island, a thriving rumor mill exists here. Even the official fishwrapper - ahem, the Kwajalein Hourglass - carries a rumor control article almost weekly either confiming or denying the latest rumor circulating on island.

I could fill a blog with all the rumors I've heard, from the upcoming budget cuts and almost inevitable layoffs to the long-delayed DSL internet project for the residents. Like most people here. I tend to be cynical about them firmly believing in the adage 'I'll believe when I actually see it happen!' Some have even deliberately spread false rumors in order to gauge the RUMINT capabilities of the island, which are formidable.

Whatever you've done, good or bad is fodder for the rumor mill. Didja get shit-faced at the Vets' Hall and/or the Snake Pit, waking up in the gutter with a hangover of titanic proportions? (You're lucky Kwaj Five-O didn't bag you for public intoxication.) Be very friendly with a single girl or guy on this island and people will begin assuming you're getting laid on a regular basis. (For those of us who don't get it on a regular basis, we're not missing much.)

Just for curiosity's sake I wouldn't mind being the proverbial fly on the wall overhearing what kind of rumors are spread about me. (Personally, I don't give a rat's ass, but forearmed is forewarned.)

Crime in paradise - yes, it does happen!

2011-05-24T13:49:00.000+12:00

Eventually it was going to catch up to me, and Sunday morning it did. My bike was 'borrowed' (read: stolen) from my BQ. Pissed me off to no end.

Many times, some (Marshallese, but haoles will do it too) will seize a target of opportunity and jump on a bike, especially if they are running late to work or the ferry. Most times, the bike is left abandoned at the DSC bike racks, the airport terminal and Kwaj Lodge, but I wouldn't be surprised if my bike fell victim to a chop shop - there is an underground market for bike parts, since they're always in short supply. KPD, like many police departments doesn't have the manpower to chase down bike theft. My bike isn't too hard to find - it's got my Texas Wing Civil Air Patrol license plate. I'll keep checking the DSC and other places to see if it turns up before I fork over money for a new bike. Guess I learned my lesson - my bike is staying locked up whenever I'm not ridng it.

New smoking restrictions on island

2011-05-20T10:21:00.000+12:00

As of May 15, new smoking restrictions are being enforced on island. Current DoD and Army regulations prohibit smoking in the workplace and in government owned vehicles (to include water and and aircraft). Designated smoking areas must be at least fifty feet away from main building entrances (subject to how it's interpreted by some at Kwaj Five-O - some will whip out the tape measure). Of course, smoking is prohibited in BQ rooms (but allowed in family housing, though the threat of a very high ($1000) COOM (Change of Occupancy Maintenance) bill to remove the smoke smell at PCS deters most from doing so. (Another sticking point between the haves (the families) and the have nots (the BQ residents)). Some BQ rats who do smoke in their rooms (not me!) try new and novel ways to clear out the smoke, sometimes by smoking under the bathroom vent. Unfortunately, it doesn't take long for the smell to permeate the air conditioning system in the BQs.There are a couple of cops on duty that even sniff around our BQ room entrances to try and catch smokers in flagrante delicto.

The new smoking restrictions effectively make Beautiful Downtown Kwaj a no-smoking zone (Except the laundry and AAFES warehouse, go figger!). It also covers the USAKA TOC (Tactical Operations Center), the Richardson Theater, Island Memorial Chapel, Religious Education Building and the Marshallese Cultural Center. Although the regulations provide for reasonable accommodation in establishing designated smoking areas, most are just a park bench or a picnic table out in the open, exposed to the elements. So... if it rains, you're shit outta luck. In certain areas, there is technically no way to hit the 50-foot no smoking rule, so you're in the clear only if you stand in the middle of the street. (For which KPD will gladly hand you a ticket for blocking the flow of traffic and creating a hazard.)

Another major complaint is the inability of the AAFES shoppette to stock cigarettes and other tobacco products, to include disposable lighters. Is it because of the sheer incompetence of whoever places the order for the barge? Is it because some of the merchandise 'falls off the truck' between the docks and the warehouses? Is it because the shelves are stocked to bare minimums and quickly run out on Marshallese Shopping Day? Is it because of a verbal order of the garrison commander (a rabid anti-smoker) to make it very difficult for smokers to indulge in their habit? No one really knows, or is willing to come up with a straight story, thus the conspiracy theories are rife on the rock. The favorite complaint going around with the smokers is that the new designated smoking area for the island is on the edge of the island's reef dropoff oceanside, if they make the anti-smoking crusade any stricter. Probably won't happen but quality of life on this rock has been eroding on the island for many years. We learn to live with it and drive on.

Should I stay or should I go?

2011-05-10T08:42:00.001+12:00

Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

(This famous song by The Clash is traditionally played at full volume within the cadet area of the U.S. Air Force Academy the night before 'Commitment Day'. Up until that time, the incoming second class (juniors in the silly-vilian world) incurs no recoupment nor military service obligation; attending the first day of class of second-class year commits a cadet to either complete their final two years at the 'University of Science and Fine Arts', or if resigning or disenrolled for whatever reason, incur recoupment of their 'free' education, which could be paid off by enlisting for four years. For the record, I never attended USAFA, but know a few people that have, and I'm familiar with their culture.)

I received my offer to extend my contract in this morning's mail. Typically, when your initial two-year contract is about to end you are offered three choices:

1) Extend for one full year, giving 60 days' notice in writing before the end of the contract extension should I resign.

2) Extend for a 'rolling 90'; contract is extended indefinitely, giving 90 days' notice in writing should I resign.

In either case, the minimum notice must be given before getting a 'contract complete' notation in your personnel records; this basically means that the company pays for your airfare back to your home of record. (They'll send your household goods back anyway, as long as you've gone past the 50% mark (1 year) in your initial contract.)

The final option is to not renew your contract, in which the notification also serves as your 60-day notice to begin the PCS (permanent change of station) process.

In the nearly 21 months I've been here on Kwaj, I've enjoyed the experience of living and working in a tropical island and the many friends I've made on this remote little rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. The title 'Kwajaleinian', 'Kwajite' or 'Kwajie' will never leave me. Sure, I've suffered through shortages of essential items (it's on the next barge!), lousy food at the PDR, painfully slow dial-up internet, the occasional case of 'rock fever' that is only cured by going off-island and venting off steam by complaining and grumbling at times. However, it's kept my sanity in check thoughout this tour. I've seen some people hate this place the moment they get off the airplane, counting the days until the end of the contract or finding some way to get booted off the island. I've also seen others that fell in love with the island life and community, and have spent many years here. I really do like the job and the island life; I guess this is the reward for surviving nearly three years in the job from hell (which I've already explained in detail in a previous blog post). I've reached my decision, and it really didn't take very long for me to make it:

I am extending my contract via the 'rolling 90s' option.

Eventually I'll get tired of the island life and want to return to the creature comforts back on the mainland, but that's something to consider in the future. It's the least of my worries right now.

In the merry, merry month of May...

2011-05-05T13:12:00.000+12:00

May begins on Kwaj not much different than any other month, though the 'dry' season is beginning to taper off. It was an unusual dry season in which at least once or twice a week we'd get storms that rivaled a wet season downpour. At least it kept the lens wells replenished with fresh water.

Gonna be a busy month at Vets' Hall. This weekend the US Coast Guard cutter Jarvis (WHEC-725) pulls into Kwaj for weekend liberty and the retirement of one of their master chief petty officers. We're setting up a party at the hall Saturday with burgers and dogs on the grill and pulled BBQ pork and brisket cooked in the smoker. At least I'm working only half a day on Saturday (made up the time working through lunch during the week)!

This past Sunday we had Kwaj's Jimmy Buffett Parrothead party at Hamilton Beach next to the Yacht Club, complete with Landshark lager beer, margaritas and cheeseburgers in paradise! Of course, yours truly got goat-roped into working the grill cooking up burgers (which I didn't mind). Hot, nasty work, but a dip in the lagoon cooled me off. I was thoroughly exhausted so I cut out early (it's usually a long night partying).

Elections for next year's slate of officers at the American Legion post is coming up. I've been nominated for Post Adjutant (secretary).

All good vacations must come to and end... but not yet!

2011-05-04T09:55:00.000+12:00

Well, I'm back in Honolulu after two weeks home in Las Vegas. Not much went on except a little rest and recuperation that goes a long way to alleviating the symptoms of 'rock fever'. Unpacked and configured my new desktop computer and netbook, and packed several boxes (including my new desktop) for mailing. Not to worry, the packages are insured, but still crossing my fingers the postal gorillas don't interpret 'FRAGILE - HANDLE WITH CARE' as 'THROW IT ACROSS THE ROOM AS HARD AS YOU CAN'. I'm also hoping that the pending shutdown of the federal government (if the FY 2011 budget isn't approved) doesn't put a monkey wrench on deliveries to the rock!

For the airplane geeks who read this blog, here are the spotter's details

Wednesday, March 23 CO 956 KWA-MAJ-HNL: Boeing 737-824 WL ETOPS N27246

Wednesday, March 23 HA 6 HNL-LAS: Boeing 767-33A WL N589HA 'Moli'

Thursday, April 7 HA 7 LAS-HNL: Airbus A330-243 N382HA 'Iwakeli'i'

Monday/Tuesday April 11/12 HNL-MAJ-KWA: Boeing 737-824 WL ETOPS N14235

Uneventful flight out and back, though I was able to upgrade the Kwaj-Hono (and back) leg to 'International Business Class' (first class by any other name) for about $100 each way. (The full fare was already paid for in miles - 40,000 for the round trip plus taxes.) First time flying Hawaiian Airlines to the mainland; I was quite impressed with the service, though it is a long non-stop flight to Las Vegas (and back!). HA does offer free food onboard, though you can pay a little extra and get an upgraded selection such as sushi and teriyaki chicken. On the 767, you can rent the use of a 'Dig-E-Player' for $12, which is loaded with inflight entertainment. On the new A330s, the inflight entertainment is on the seat backs of economy class (except on 'Preferred' bulkhead or exit-row seating, in which they're mounted on a retractable pedestal like first class. For $25 to upgrade to preferred seats, it's worth it. Note: Vegas flights depart from the Inter-Island terminal at HNL and arrive at Terminal 2 in LAS.

Back to the usual grind on Kwaj... slow internet (a bit faster on unsecure wireless at the ARC or the snack bar), crappy food at the PDR, and more of the usual stuff we all grumble about. (Note to 'Kwaj cheerleaders' - it's how we vent off our stress; if we stopped complaining, cannibalism would be rampant!) My packages (including my new desktop computer and monitor) arrived about a week and a half later no worse for the wear of a 5000-mile journey via the U.S. Postal Service. Now if I can find the motivation to put away stuff in my BQ room...

One more day and a wake up...

2011-03-22T10:43:00.000+12:00

... before I fly off this rock for some vacation! Hard to believe that only a few months ago (back in October) I made my plans for this vacation - time flies when you're having fun out here! Granted, I was already beginning to feel the effects of 'rock fever' but I'm glad I broke up my vacation in two smaller periods; it does make things easier.

Finishing packing my bags and cleaning up my BQ room tonight.One more nine-hour work day today, five hours Wednesday (making up time working through lunch to get the afternoon off), then take care of any last-minute preparations before checking in at the Kwaj terminal at 4:15 pm.

Full trip report in my next blog post.

TSUNAMI!!!

2011-03-15T10:07:00.002+12:00

In case you guys were wondering... Kwajalein is still above water and this blog author is safe and sound. As I've already explained in older blog posts, tsunamis can't really form on the atoll due to the very deep ocean shelf just offshore - it drops to over 5000 feet depth; depths of over 15,000 feet are quite common in the open ocean areas out here. The only effect we got was barely a two-foot ripple in the water that generally went around the atoll. Tides within the lagoon were affected but not much. Below is a graphic (courtesy of the British newspaper The Sun on how tsunamis form:

Of course, the powers-that-be (U.S. Army Kwajalein Atoll - USAKA (pronounced, 'you-sacka')) reacted - some would say overreacted - at 22:15 local the island evacuation plan was activated with the blasting of the warning sirens. Anyone living on the first floors of family housing and BQs was ordered to evacuate and find shelter on the second or higher floors. All the ships moored in Kwaj harbor put out to sea as fast as they could haul ass.

So what do we BQ rats do when the end of the world is nigh?

THROW A TSUNAMI PARTY!!!

There was lots of drinking and singing and waiting for the catastrophe of titanic proportions that never came. Even joked about Kwaj Five-O handing out 'tsunami tickets' for not evacuating quickly enough. (Don't get me started on them; most of them are good guys but there are more than a fair share of toolbags that tar and feather 'Dein Freund und Helfer' (German for 'Your friend and helper') on the island...)

The Continental 'Island Hopper' had to leave behind on Kwaj any passengers heading to Majuro - it went directly to Honolulu. (It was running late, and would arrive around the time the tsunami was scheduled to hit Hono or shortly afterward.) The stranded passengers were sequestered in the REB (Religious Education Building) next to the chapel and were closely escorted by KPD everywhere they went (Can't let any foreign nationals wander aimlessly around a sensitive national security facility of the United States military!) The local Marshallese who live on Ebeye who were traveling to Majuro were allowed to go home. They reboarded Air Mike 956 and continued their journey on Monday.

All clear was sounded around midnight. Needless to say I was dragging my sorry ass at work the next morning; luckily I only had to work half a day on Saturday.

Saturday night at the Vets' Hall was pretty low key, considering many were recharging their batteries from the tsumami party and saving their wanton drunken debauchery for Sunday night's Saint Patrick's Day party.

Sunday night's Saint Patrick's Day party at the hall (yea, we know it's on Thursday but can't have most of the island suffering from hangovers on Friday) was very well attended, as the local band 'Insane Gecko Posse' was playing.

While yours truly would have liked to gotten his Irish on and get throroughly snockered (remember, I'm Noo Yawk Irish on my late father's side, only three generations removed from the Auld Sod), I had to work as a designated driver, as there was a last minute schedule change and the bar back couldn't make it in. (- cough - Bullshit! - cough -). So, nothing but soft drinks for me all night, and shuttling drunken revelers and their bikes on a pickup truck rented from the automotive department until about four o'clock in the morning. No big deal for me... I can wait until next weekend or next week when I fly outta here on vacation to Vegas, baby!

(EDIT 3/22/11: The Hourglass added some more detail that wasn't available when I wrote this post. A four-foot surge was recorded near the Small Boat Marina around 11:45 pm, but it was at low tide; had it been high tide we would probably have gotten about a foot or so of water on the island. There were some shallow spots lagoon sidewhere the water completely receded, then surged back - the hallmark of an imminent tsunami. The newspaper also published a list of significant tsunamis that passed through Kwaj over the years. USAKA command learned some lessons and I wouldn't be surprised if changes are made.)

Island food (other than the PDR!)

2011-03-10T09:07:00.000+12:00

In the 18 months I've been here on island I've had the opportunity to try out cuisine from far off lands - Hawaiian, Korean, Japanese, Filipino, etc. etc. and so forth. Now when I go back stateside or stop off in Honolulu on the way back to Kwaj, I'm always game to try something new. Yes, I'm hopelessly addicted to the Hawaiian plate lunch - entree, two scoops of steamed white rice and a scoop of macaroni salad, though those who prefer healthier fare can opt for brown rice or even a salad.

For those who are unfamiliar, here's the basics of Hawaiian comfort food, aka the plate lunch:

Spam Musubi - Next to Guam, Hawaii is one of the largest consumers of that canned meat many people love to hate and which in today's digital age is synonymous with 'junk email'. Basically, it's a block of steamed white rice formed in a mould, topped with a slice of Spam (usually marinated in shoyu (soy sauce - nobody in Hawaii calls it other than by its Japanese name) and mirin (Japanese rice wine), then lightly fried) and wrapped with a strip of nori (sheets of dried seaweed). Connvenience stores and supermarkets throughout Hawaii sell them as a snack that can easily be eaten on the go. I grew up eating Spam (which is called jamonada in Venezuela) and like eating it to this day; I just don't like receiving junk email - spam - in my inbox! (The above is Hormel's limited-edition Spam can for the Hawaii market.)

Spam musubi is generally not served as a plate lunch meal. Occasionally, they might be made with a small strip of egg, folded Japanese tamagoyaki style and cut to fit the musubi block under the Spam. There are also several variations of Spam musubi, none of them with any Spam; teriyaki chicken and sliced hot dog (usually Hawaii's own Redondo's hot dogs) are common.

Loco Moco - This ubiquitous plate lunch entreee is one or two grilled hamburger patties smothered in gravy and topped with a fried egg. Quick, cheap and guaranteed to raise the hackles of the healthy food police! Without the egg, it's just a hamburger steak.

Kalua Pork - Traditionally cooked whole in an imu (a Hawaiian underground oven), we on Kwaj don't have that luxury; a dig permit is required to dig six inches or deeper on the rock). Those who cook it here will either use a smoker or cook it in a slow cooker. You really can't tell the difference. Usually served on a bed of shredded raw cabbage.

Göteborg Musubi - Kauai's variation of musubi. It's a slice of Göteborg summer sausage, sauteed and topped with a rice ball sprinkled with furikake (shredded bits of nori, sesame seed and dried fish (bonito) commonly used as a seasoning in Japan). Outside of the Garden Isle it's not well known, but it is catching in popularity in the neighbor islands.

Poke - Pronounced 'po-keh', though some malihini (newcomers) and locals might pronounce it 'po-kee', it's raw fish usually mixed with chopped green onion, shoyu, sesame oil and inamona (roasted and ground kukui nut (candlenut).

Lomi-lomi salmon - A tomato, onion and salmon salad commonly served at a luau. Actually, salmon is not native to Hawaiian waters. Those who are manini (cheapskates) skimp on the salmon wind up making 'lomi-lomi tomato', which is usually frowned upon.

Korean entrees are also quite popular for plate lunches:

Kalbi (sometimes spelled galbi) - Beef short ribs, marinated and grilled on a barbecue (though pork is sometimes used).

Bulgogi - Marinated and grilled slices of beef, chicken or pork

Meat jun (Korean: jeon) - Marinated slices of beef dipped in an egg batter and fried. More of an island-style Korean dish, as few mainland Korean restaurants have this on their menu,

Not surprisingly, Korean food is usually basted with a spicy barbecue sauce called kochujang (sometimes spelled gochujang). It actually is a hot pepper paste prepared and aged much like kimchi. It's kind of sweet but conceals a fiery kick to it. Many times, it's thinned down to a basting sauce for barbecue.

I can go on and on about the wonders of Asian and Pacific Rim cuisine, but that would fill a book. So, enjoy - for now!

Vacation around the corner!

2011-02-23T15:44:00.000+12:00

In only a month's time I grt to ride on a jet plane off this rock for some well-deserved vacation! Unlike last year's vacation I'm breaking it up into two parts of about two weeks each. This half will be just for kicking back and relaxing at home, while the other half will be taken around mid-October to attend CAP National Staff College at Maxwell AFB.

While I'm eager for vacation to begin, I'm keeping it more low-key than last year. There has been some talk about moving some mission functions (including the department I work for) to Huntsville, Alabama, but like any news about the island, such news is taken with a grain of salt or a cynical 'I'll believe it when I see it!' If it does happen and they offer a decent relocation package for me to go to Huntsville, I'll be taking the company up on their offer.

The Coasties from the buoy tender Sequoia made a brief stop here on Kwajalein last week, and Saturday night the guys made a significant dent in the Vets' Hall beer supply. Our next shipment is expected sometime in one of the March barges. Mardi Gras and St. Patrick's Day are two very popular events on island; expect both the Snake Pit and Vets' Hall to be open. Food sales are slow, though occasionally I'll experiment with a couple of new bar food items other than the usual breakfast burrito, BLTs, fried egg and grilled cheese sandwiches. If it wasn't for Surfway being so expensive and supply being iffy, I'd offer these specials more often for variety. The Coasties brought a couple of cases of appetizer kabobs (chicken and beef/lamb) from their galley and put them out on the grill outside, basting them with spicy Korean kochoojang barbeque sauce, which gave them a flavor that was out of this world. Now to find out if the kabobs are available in our supply system; if they do, then I'll propose to the Vets' Hall ops manager if we can swing it. I'll probably have to cook 'em up early and serve them in a way that can be sold and maintain a profit for the hall.

A farewell to my alma mater...

2011-02-14T18:54:00.000+12:00

This blog entry really doesn't talk about life on Kwaj, but a part of my life that I am truly proud of. On Saturday, February 12 (Sunday, February 13 Kwaj time) North Miami Senior High School opened its doors to alumni one last time. For obvious reasons, I couldn't attend (namely me being 7300 miles away in a little rock on an atoll in the middle of the Pacific Ocean), but I followed the event by making a couple of phone calls to a few alumni (my phone bill is gonna be expensive when it's due next month!) who did attend and viewing the many pictures and videos taken on Facebook. Over 3000 alumni attended the event last night and there was not a dry eye in the house...

As some of you may know, I am a graduate of the Class of 1983 of North Miami Senior High School in North Miami, Florida. From 1951 (the first senior class graduated in 1955) until 2009 the original school building was a part of the North Miami community. A brief history of the school I wrote can be read here: A Short History of North Miami Senior High School . A new North Miami Senior High has been built to take its place a block away, but the memories of the old school will never fade. Within a few weeks, the old school will fall to the wrecker's ball (with the exception of the gymnasium, wich was donated to the City of North Miami) and become an open field again. This time, it'll become the athletic field for North Miami Middle School and a joint-use park by the City of North Miami.

Thirty years ago when I first walked the halls as a 'baby Pioneer' (the traditional moniker for 10th graders at the time - the 'baby Pioneer' title now goes to the 9th grade) I wasn't very big into school spirit; it eventually grew into me until by the time I walked across the stage three years later to accept my diploma, I truly bled the school colors of green and gray. I'm proud to know some famous people as Pioneer alumni but the closest relationship I have is with my own graduating class, many of whom I still keep in touch to this day.

I may be nearly 7300 miles away from my alma mater according to the Great Circle Mapper, but I'm still proud to call myself a Pioneer!

...to thee we pledge our loyalty, to thee our minds and hearts
From thy radiant Green and Gray, our love will ne'er depart!
Hail to North Miami, hail to North Miami, hail to thee!

February... just another month on the rock!

2011-02-04T11:17:00.000+12:00

The first month of 2011 is now in the history books. Life is pretty much the same here on Kwajalein, though there's always the usual irritants that people love to complain about. Let me count the ways...

In a cost-cutting move, the express bus service from the technical area to downtown was eliminated. So, if you have an appointment downtown or at the medical or dental hobby shop, you either walk or ride your bike. God forbid you get caught misusing government property by driving a golf cart or a vehicle for personal business!

We filled out a couple of surveys... one to gauge the quality of housing and another the quality of AAFES on the island. Anyone wanna guess where all the negative responses went?

Drive a boat on island? Don't touch a drop of alcohol - the slightest amount on the breathalyzer gets you a BWI (Boating While Intoxicated) conviction. No one to staff the recompression chamber? You can't scuba dive. (That brought the diving community to arms.)

The powers-that-be are encouraging Kwaj Five-O to write more tickets for the most insignificant violations. Smoke too close to a building? BAM! Leave a package unattended on your bike, even if you're just stopping briefly at the shopette? WHAM! Forget to use proper bike signals when turning? Sign on the line, please. They may not amount to much, but collect a few too many and you might get a bar from the island! No wonder the general attitude around here is downright bitter and cynical.

While I don't have a problem with following regulations, sometimes I wonder why the head shed just throws up another restriction without carefully thinking it through. Eventually the rule is changed quietly and without fanfare, which proves my point.

I'm beginning to get tired of serving on the chow hall committee. Improvements are suggested, applied and just as quickly forgotten.

OK, now that I've vented my spleen for the month...

I didn't get picked up for staff duty at the CAP Pacific Region Staff College. No biggie... it's all vacation time for me come next month. I will apply for CAP National Staff College in October. Means I'll hafta travel to Maxwell AFB in Alabama. I'll find some way to do my RSC staff duty, as that and NSC is all I need to complete Level V and the Gill Robb Wilson award.

Took the Amateur Extra licensing exam last night, but didn't pass it. It's not easy. I was busy at work and with other extracurricular things that I really didn't find much time to study. No worries, it'll be offered again.

Gonna be a busy weekend in the kitchen at Vet's Hall. The usual 'supper for the drunk and wasted' on Saturday, and we're doing the same on Sunday night for a concert by one of the most popular bands on island, the Zooks. And on Monday morning, making the Super Bowl breakfast. I might wind up crashing in the Vets' Hall couch in the social area Sunday night!

More of the same old stuff...

2011-01-14T15:23:00.000+12:00

Middle of the month, getting ready for the Martin Luther King birthday holiday weekend. The slow holiday period ended with a vengeance - the range safety ship Worthy returned to Kwaj. And now to finish working on and closing out about a half dozen projects on the Worthy that were deferred while the ship was out to sea supporting missions.

Helped build a new 'tiki bar' in the Vets' Hall patio area. The previous one was on its last legs and was frequently the target of 'barf attacks' from drunk partiers, along with being exposed to the elements and lots of spilled beer and other drinks. It's designed to be easier to clean than the old bar - just hose it down with a pressure washer! Eventually a sheet stainless steel bar top will be installed.

The new bar extension is now operational, though the new ice maker is giving us fits during installation. Knowing how the usual Vets' Hall volunteer crew works, we'll improvise, adapt and overcome the problem at hand. It's now much easier for the bar staff to stock the bar without them having to exit the bar area, especially on crowded nights.

My stateside car is now paid off and my title and satisfaction of lien was received at my mom's house the other day. That's $300 less I have to deal with per month, and the car still runs fine - just so long as I remind someone (either my mom or brother) to drive it around every once in a while.

Still haven't heard anything about staffing CAP Pacific Region Staff College. I timed my vacation to work it; this and CAP National Staff College is all I need to complete the requirements of Level 5 of the CAP professional development program and earn the prestigious Gill Robb Wilson award. (It's similar to - but not quite the equivalent of - the cadet program's General Carl Spaatz award, which I never earned). Either way, I'll have me some vacation time - anything just to get off the rock! Then three days, four nights in Honolulu before my parole from Kwajatraz ends.

Once vacation is done and over with I'm still seriously thinking about taking scuba diving lessons. The amazing descriptions and photographs from some of the scuba divers here in Kwaj make it worth my while to at least try it out.

Hau'oli makahiki hou 2011!

2011-01-04T11:14:00.000+12:00

For the linguistically-challenged, that's 'Happy New Year' in Hawaiian.

New year, new challenges... after a three day holiday weekend, back to the work grind!

New Year's Eve was not as crazy as previous years at Vets' Hall, though I was busy cooking up 'supper for the drunk and wasted' back in the kitchen with a couple of fellow Legion members. Just your typical bar food - breakfast burritos, burgers, fried egg and cheese sandwiches. This year there were several competing events on the island that cut down on attendance at the hall: fun run at Emon beach, bingo at the Pacific Club and the Snake Pit, not to mention other private parties at the boat shacks and in people's homes. We did have bus service between downtown and the hall, but the bus croaked towards the end of the evening. I stayed relatively sober during the evening - my job wasn't done until the kitchen was cleaned up.

New Year's Day was pretty quiet... the party animals were nursing their hangovers and I pretty much stayed in my room. I went to the Snake Pit later and had a few cold ones, as Vets' Hall was closed.

Sunday night was karaoke night at the Pit... proof positive that some should never sing, drunk or sober!

It's an unwritten tradition that we celebrate birthdays twice on Kwajalein. Since we're on the other side of the international date line, we celebrate out 'Kwaj birthday' first, followed by the CONUS (CONtinental United States) birthday the following day.

Tuesday morning brought the familiar roar of the ATI DC-8 as it landed on Runway 06, hopefully with mail and produce! Gonna be packed at the parcel pickup window at the post office this afternoon!

December, remember...

2010-12-23T15:21:00.000+12:00

The end of the year 2010 here on Kwaj is more of the usual... things winding down in preparation for the holidays, etc. etc. and so forth. A palm tree at the north end of 'Beautiful Downtown Kwajalein' gets decorated with lights and serves as our Christmas tree. Due to 'aircraft mechanical difficulties and other mission requirements' there was no fresh produce loaded on the ATI DC-8 on Tuesday. That got all the families all pissed off, especially if they were planning to cook up a Christmas dinner.

The construction of the bar extension at Vets' Hall is pretty much complete except for some drywall finishing and paint. We're taking a couple of weeks off to enjoy the holidays before starting up construction of the chair room in the back of the hall. When that gets finished, it'll be put to use for private parties and poker games. (And it could be made up into a Masonic lodge room in a pinch!)

Since Christmas, New Year and my birthday are within days of each other, I treated myself with some retail therapy. Bought an iPod and a Kindle ebook reader. Considering that BQ rooms don't have much storage space, many have chosen to keep their music, video and book libraries in electronic format. A healthy underground trade of portable hard drives filled with movies and music keeps our entertainment pretty close to being up to date. Now if I can find some motivation to clean up my BQ room...

Christmas dinner at the PDR is pretty much the same as the Thanksgiving dinner - but I betcha there ain't gonna be too many fresh fruits or vegetables! One thing I hate is how the PDR describes their special meals in overused terminology usually seen in an overpriced restaurant. 'Tantalizing entrees' my ass! We still get a chuckle or two reading the menu selections, such is Kwaj humor. At least being a BQ rat my meals are 'part of the total compensation package' so I don't hafta pay to eat. We actually have better food at Saturday night's 'supper for the drunk and wasted' at Vets' Hall than the chow at the PDR!

OK, enough venting of the spleen for now... Helping out with the annual 'Stray Dog' Christmas party at the ARC Saturday, where I'll be grilling my (in)famous teriyaki shrimp skewers. Gonna start thawing and marinating the shrimp Friday and skewering it early Saturday. I need to check what time to start grilling.

And for all of you who regularly read this blog (sounds of crickets chirping)... I wish all of you a Meddi Kirijmoj (Merry Christmas in Marshallese), Mele Kalikimaka (the same in Hawaiian) and Hau'oli makahiki hou (Happy New Year in Hawaiian)!

November on the rock...

2010-11-25T11:15:00.000+12:00

Halloween's done and over with for another year... Veterans' Day being the only holiday that's fixed (along with Christmas and Independence Day), it fell on a Thursday. The Legion post brought out the rifle squad (I didn't participate; my left shoulder's bothering me... I'll have to have it looked at over at the medical hobby shop) and participated in the wreath laying ceremony at Flagpole Hill. The night before, we fired up the smoker in the patio and began to smoke some brisket and pork butts (the intention was to make pulled pork, but somehow the pork didn't fall off the bone as expected) in preparation for a Veterans' Day picnic lunch/dinner for the island's veterans and active-duty military.

Our work wasn't even close to finished yet; we began preparations for our biannual Mongolian barbecue on Sunday the 14th. As usual, I prepared the sauces and oils for the event. We raised over $2100 for the Disabled American Veterans. Again, many compliments received for the chow. And we still had enough leftover chopped vegetables - all we had to do was get some more beef, pork and chicken - for Saturday night's 'supper for the drunk and wasted'. $8 a plate and it sold out quickly. Yours truly manned the grill Saturday night until the propane gas bottles ran out (around 11:30). I was tired as hell afterwards.

We also began construction of the bar extension - punching out a hole in the CMU wall and framing out a separate room for liquor storage - makes things easier for the bar staff to restock liquor without having to leave the immediate bar area.

Thanksgiving is already around the corner, and as usual, food shortages are the norm. Someone screwed up ordering again. The usual Thanksgiving spread at the PDR; most eat the crab legs and shrimp, since it isn't normally served on a daily basis. Combat shoppers are getting ready for our version of 'Black Friday'.

The diving community is up in arms over a temporary policy change to diving on Kwaj - no diving at all unless the recompression chamber is manned and available. Previously, diving was restricted to a maximum 50 foot depth whenever the chamber wasn't operating. USAKA and its bureaucracy rearing up its ugly head again... hopefully it'll get resolved to everyone's satisfaction.

Finally made my last payment to KRS Finance for my dentures. Bought my tickets for vacation back in Vegas around the March-April timeframe. My stateside car will be paid off in January, leaving me only credit cards and my student loan to pay off. And Christmas is around the corner...

Halloween 2010

2010-11-02T13:32:00.001+12:00

"Trick or treat, smell yer feet, gimme something good to eat!" Go away crumb-crushers... this here Halloween party is for the adults on the island!

Our annual Halloween party was a roaring success! Over the course of last week the Vets' Hall bar and social hall areas were transformed into a haunted house. The party was very well attended - I'm guessing over 100 were milling in and around the bar and social area at the height of the party around 10:00 pm.

Costumes ranged from the very simple to the very complex. One of my co-workers dressed up as a zombie with such realistic makeup you could hardly tell it was her... besides, she was in 'character' most of the night. She had us doing double-takes until we found out it was her. I kept my Halloween costume simple - dressed up as an 'airline captain', with non-specific 'airline' wings and captain's shoulder marks. I was pissed that my captain's hat - complete with 'scrambled eggs' on the visor - didn't make in the mail on time (it's probably somewhere in the Kwaj post office just waiting to be stuck in my mailbox - packages get mis-pitched regularly there).

Of course, many were getting hammered as the evening wore on, including myself. Vets' Hall arranged for shuttle bus service between the hall and the BQ and family housing area, and that was a good idea (it's also USAKA policy for all major parties to include a cart or bus service to transport people back home, especially if they're wasted.) I brought my bike down to the hall, but decided to play it safe and took the bus home. I picked up my bike at the hall the following day. Even a stiff evening rain shower didn't deter the party animals from enjoying a good time.

Next up is Veterans' Day and Thanksgiving, followed by Christmas and New Year.

POSTSCRIPT: My captain's cap finally arrived - two weeks after Halloween. In the military's postal service's infinite wisdom, the package took a long detour via Diego Garcia before being re-routed back to Kwajalein.

Mid-October on the rock...

2010-10-23T13:19:00.000+12:00

Back to writing in my blog after a few weeks... nothing much in earnest going on the island.

I was named to be the chairman of the Vets' Hall committee, replacing a long-time member who is PCSing next month. It's largely an oversight committee; we have a great bar and operations staff that keep the place going, and a dedicated cadre of members who do repairs to the hall donating their labor as needed.

Work-wise, my co-worker departed on his annual leave; he'll be back at the end of November. I'm in the process of revising and updating the department's drafting standards manual. Work is steady, and keeps me out of trouble.

Bought my freebie ticket (40,000 miles and $20 in taxes) on Continental for the Kwaj-Hono leg in March. Will be buying my ticket for my leg from Honolulu to Vegas more than likely in January. Hawaiian has the cheapest fare and it's nonstop to the 'ninth island' and back. I timed it so it's around the time of the CAP Pacific Region Staff College at Nellis AFB (I was a student there last year.) I'm applying for a staff position, either as a seminar leader or wherever else I can be placed. Then looking into the mid-October 2011 timeframe to attend the CAP National Staff College at Maxwell AFB in Alabama. With that and some paperwork and I should have all my requirements done for Level V of CAP's professional development program and the Gill Robb Wilson award.

Got rid of my old Kwaj bike and bought a new one. The old bike, being a men's model was difficult to get on and off from. (I was not blessed with long legs!) Finishing paying off my dentures (it'll be paid off in December) and my stateside car will also be paid off as well.

Labor Day 2010

2010-09-08T08:47:00.000+12:00

Labor Day traditionally marks the end of the summer season with a three-day weekend.

Saturday (last day of the work week) dawned wet and rainy and stayed wet and rainy all day and most of the night. Because of our location close to the equator, our weather is influenced by the Intertropical Convergence Zone (ITCZ); the main source of rain showers and storms in the tropics. This is our rainy season, though October and November will probably be the months where it rains most. Needless to say, in a bicycle-oriented culture rain kills business, especially at the bars on island.

Sunday I attended a PCS party for a long time Kwaj couple (they were not affected by the layoffs). It was very well attended and the food was onolicious. Even tried poke for the first time. (Poke is a mix of chopped fresh raw fish with spices, shoyu and some chopped vegetables and limu, a form of seaweed.) There was one kind made with ahi (tuna) and another made with tako (octopus). The latter was a bit too chewy for my taste. Had a Romeo and Julieta Churchill (don't sic Customs on me; this was the in-exile brand) washed down with Glenlivet on the rocks. Like many PCS parties it was kind of subdued; it's hard saying farewell to a Kwajer or a Roi Rat who has spent a long time living and working here. (There is also another type of PCS party: the 'wheels up' - that's only held after a person (usually someone who isn't well liked in the community) leaves the island. It's the island's way of saying 'goodbye and good riddance; don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya!')

Monday was the Labor Day beach party at Emon Beach. The traditional Roi chili cookoff moved to Kwaj for this weekend, benefiting the Enniburr Children's Christmas Fund, which provides Christmas gifts for children on the outer islands. I didn't go to it since I had other things to do.

Tuesday (the actual holiday) was also pretty quiet. Other than I didn't have to work that day it was pretty much just like any other day. (Except that the BX/BXtra/Shoppette operated on short hours and Surfway was closed.)

Black Wednesday

2010-09-02T10:54:00.000+12:00

Budget cuts for fiscal year 2011 hit the island hard; a 20% reduction from the 2010 budget. Unfortunately, this also means a reduction in force - layoffs. Some have already received the bad news; unfilled vacancies were also cut as well. Some who were affected have taken it hard, others somewhat expected it. It affected many long-time Kwajers and Roi Rats.

Luckily, my department escaped the chopping block; no positions were cut. Those individuals who were cut will probably leave the island within 2-4 weeks, depending on the outprocessing workload. I wouldn't be surprised if 'pink slip' parties are starting up by this weekend, if not sooner.

September 1 was also the day that Kwaj Five-O was to begin strictly enforcing the new bicycle tag rule - bikes and trailers that do not have the new blue and white sticker or still have the old yellow sticker will get their bikes impounded and the owners fined. Needless to say an incorrect statement was taken as gospel by some residents courtesy of the Kwaj coconut telegraph and complaints abounded when it was reported that KPD was going into people's backyards in the family quarters area and seizing unregistered bikes. (It wasn't the case.)

This past Sunday I helped organize a party for some of the Kwajalein Schools teachers who got laid off. (They were one of the first ones to go, but the notice came too late for many to try and find a teaching job back on the mainland since the school year has now started.) Bought some shrimp, steaks, burgers, bratwurst and hot dogs and cooked it on the grill at Vets' Hall. All enjoyed the food and entertainment, with one of the island residents bringing in his karaoke equipment.

Since making that first batch of shrimp for Sunday’s party at Vets’ Hall everyone’s been asking me for the recipe for the shrimp I cooked up. It was a last-minute addition to the grill menu, and I wasn’t sure how it would turn out, but everyone seems to have enjoyed it so here’s the recipe. Best thing about this recipe is it’s pretty flexible, and you can adjust it to suit your needs (or whatever’s available at Surfway). Like any new recipe, it still needs tweaking. (Don’t ask me about portion sizes, calorie counts and nutrition values… trust me, they’re onolicious!)

INGREDIENTS
2 packages uncooked shell on jumbo shrimp (21-25 per pound), deveined. (Alternate: use large (31-35 per pound) or medium-large (36-40 per pound) shrimp)

2 packages Jack Daniel’s Honey Teriyaki marinade in a bag. (Alternate: Kikkoman Teriyaki Marinade and Sauce)
PREPARATION
Thaw shrimp if frozen, but not all the way through. If shrimp shell still has legs, remove them, but keep the shell and tail on. If using large or medium-large shrimp, you may wish to skewer them with bamboo skewers.

Drop shrimp into marinade bag and seal. Knead the bag to make sure shrimp is coated. If you use the alternate method, place shrimp in a shallow pan with marinade, making sure they are well coated. Cover and marinate in refrigerator at least two hours. If you choose the skewer method, place skewers in pan. Recommend wetting the skewers first so they don’t burn on the grill.

Get the grill good and hot, then place shrimp on the grill, turning them as needed until fully cooked. Chow time!

One year down, one to go!

2010-08-14T15:44:00.000+12:00

Hard to believe it but Sunday marks my official one year anniversary of first landing on Kwajalein to begin my adventures in paradise -smack in the middle of nowhere! I've been having fun so far; have a great job, and the pace is quite tranquil compared to the pressure cooker back in the mainland. I've met many people here I can definitely call friends (but not really close friends) that generally share the same attitude I have about island life. I'm used to the long supply lines, crummy TV programming, slow internet, and the liberal application of 'Kwaj logic' (it just doesn't make sense anywhere else!) throughout the island at work and at home.

On the first payday of August (yesterday) I received my 'bonus'; the amount of a round trip ticket from Kwaj to Hono (currently at $1275) and another $1500 for travel from Honolulu to my 'point of origin', on top of my regular paycheck. Paid bills and socked away some money for my next trip off island. I'm looking at just traveling to Honolulu and meeting my mother and brother there in mid-March of next year, spending a little more time (about a week) to enjoy the sights of the city.

All good vacations must come to an end...

2010-08-14T15:29:00.000+12:00

After nearly five weeks of annual home leave it's now time to get back to my little island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. But first a brief, yet detailed synopsis of my vacation.

Most of my time was spent in broiling hot Las Vegas, where 100+ degree temperatures (and one week in the low 110s) were the norm. I generally avoid traveling out in that neck of the woods in the middle of summer but since I have family there and I had to make my Nevada residency legal by obtaining a driver's license, registering my car and registering to vote, I didn't have much choice in the matter. After nearly a year cooped up in an island, it was at first difficult to get used to seeing cars and traffic all over the place. Likewise, the dizzying array of food and shopping choices were a little much at first; compared to the limited food selection on Kwaj it was a cornucopia of all kinds of chow I missed while out in the Pacific. In-n-Out Burger, Carl's Jr., Memphis Championship Bar-B-Q, and more than a few 'local' restaurants well known for their food. Never thought I'd say it, but a Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese from McDonald's was pretty tasty! (All we have is Burger King on Kwaj.)

Midway through home leave we departed for Fort Lauderdale, Florida to take part in North Miami Senior High's Rockin 80's-90s class reunion. This was a multi-year class reunion that encompassed the class years from 1979 through 1992. During that weekend, we toured the new North Miami Senior High School (which opened for business in 2009) and made a farewell walk-through of our old high school building (it is scheduled to be demolished this fall after nearly 60 years serving the community) Even had lunch at one of the lunch hangouts popular when we were students. (It's still in business, and the pizza and garlic rolls were to die for!) The reunion evenings were fun and most of us got a chance to get together and reminesce about times past and what we were doing today. If they offered a prize for the one who traveled the farthest to attend the reunion, I would have won it hands down - 7200 miles from Kwajalein to Fort Lauderdale - but since I was part of the reunion staff I took myself out of the running. (There really was no prize, just bragging rights,)

The air travel between Las Vegas and Fort Lauderdale (and back) I wasn't too thrilled about; and I'm usually a big fan of air travel. We flew nonstop on ultra-low fare Spirit Airlines. Sure, the fares are cheap, but once you add all the fees for checked bags, seat selection and even a 'big front seat' there really wasn't much difference in price than flying a legacy airline like Continental or United. The former chairman of Continental, Gordon Bethune once said "You can make a pizza so cheap, no one will eat it." Sure, I may pay for checked bags and food on legacy carriers these days but I probably won't ever fly Spirit Airlines again. (And as you can see, I didn't bother with the flight details like my previous blog entry; but for those who want to know, both flights were on an Airbus A319-132, N514NK (LAS-FLL) and N524NK (FLL-LAS), both still in the older silver and blue-square color scheme of Spirit Airlines.

02 AUG 10 - UAL 567 LAS-SFO Boeing 757-222 N598UA
IFR clearance: LAS SHEAD6.OAL MOD3.SFO (Decoded: Departing LAS on the SHEAD6 standard instrument departure via the Coaldale, Nevada VOR transition, then into the Modesto 3 arrival procedure into San Francisco International.)

After an uneventful check-in (bought the Premier Line upgrade) we departed LAS on 25R on a clear, hot day. The ever-present marine layer fog in SFO caused a brief delay taking off but it began burning off by the time we got our vectors to final on SFO 28R. This particular 757 hasn't had the winglets installed yet, but it was painted in the new colors. Channel 9 (air to ground transmissions from the flight deck, a feature on most United flights) on the flight.

02 AUG 10 - UAL 297 SFO-HNL Boeing 777-222 N214UA
IFR clearance: SFO CINNY ALANN DADIE R576 DENNS MAGGI3.HNL (Decoded: Departing San Francisco via reporting points CINNY, ALANN, DADIE on airway R576, then to the DENNS transition into the MAGGI3 arrival for Honolulu International.)

Almost an hour and a half layover in SFO, so bought a one-time pass for the Red Carpet Club and kicked back until it was time for the flight to be called. Also had Premier line and paid for an Economy + upgrade ($69 SFO-HNL). Long taxi to SFO 28R, then takeoff due west over South San Francisco. Much of the city was still covered by the marine layer; only the top of the Sutro Tower was visible. Before long we were over a cloudy and empty Pacific Ocean. Five hours later, we approached O'ahu just south of Kane'ohe and passed over Waikiki as we lined up for the approach to HNL 4R. Flew right over a couple of Arleigh Burke-class destroyers leaving Pearl Harbor. Channel 9 on the flight, though mostly for the end of the flight.

I spent three full days and four nights in Hono enjoying the sights and playing malihini (Hawaiian for newcomer; synonymous with 'tourist') Climbed up the steep trail and 282 steps (both up and down) Diamond Head for a beautiful view of most of Honolulu from Koko Head to the airport. Of course, no first-time tour of Honolulu is complete without a tour of the USS Missouri and the USS Arizona Memorial in Pearl Harbor. A very enlightening experience.

The hotel was average; it was a little old and needed a good remodeling, but I couldn't beat the price or the location - the western end of Waikiki by the Ala Moana shopping center. Didn't really need a car, though there were some areas I would have liked to have gone off the beaten path. especially some of the 'local kine grinds' places favorably reviewed on The Tasty Island food blog.

Friday/Saturday 06/07 AUG 2010
Continental Micronesia 957 HNL-MAJ-KWA (Boeing 737-824W N13227)
IFR Clearance: OPIHI2 OPIHI CHOKO R584 MANRE R584 MAZZA MAJ (HNL-MAJ) direct via OREEO (MAJ-KWA) (Decoded: depart Honolulu on the OPIHI2 standard instrument departure via the CHOKO transition, then on airway R584 via reporting points MANRE and MAZZA before arriving in Majuro, Marshall Islands. The flight from Majuro to Kwajalein was a direct routing passing through reporting point OREEO.)

Up at o-dark-thirty to check out of the hotel and get picked up by the airport shuttle to Honolulu International Airport. After check-in and the usual indignities going through the security checkpoint, I schlepped over to the Diamond Head concourse and Gate 10, where the flight was waiting.

An uneventful departure off HNL runway 8L (most times takeoffs are on the reef runway, 8R) and we made the right hand turn for the OPIHI2 departure. The Wai'anae coast of O'ahu appeared in the distance and then disappeared into the clouds; from that point on, it's featureless Pacific Ocean (though on occasion the flight path takes us by now-closed Johnston Island). Closed the window shade and tried to sleep.

Breakfast was then served (nothing to write home about, though I had some malasadas and andagi (Okinawan fried dough balls) I bought from Zippy's last night as a backup in my carry-on. Nearly five hours later, landed in Majuro. Got off the airplane and stayed in the transit lounge until the security sweep was completed, then reboarded the aircraft.

Took off on MAJ Runway 7 for the final leg to Kwajalein. Plenty of clouds and rain, since it's the high part of the rainy season there. Finally saw my island home in the distance and made a long approach into KWA Runway 6. Disembarked for the last time and proceeded into the terminal to clear the usual island entry procedures. Back into my cage until the next time I take some vacation.

After five weeks of high-speed internet, plenty of food choices, current TV with commercials instead of old TV shows with military PSAs, I was already experiencing the 'island letdown': [sarcasm]Welcome back to the world of slower-than-molasses internet, crummy TV programming and iffy mail and supply shipments. [/sarcasm] (I forgot to add the 'sarcasm' tags and got promptly rebuked by a fellow Kwaj resident on Facebook, so I had to quickly explain myself.)

In just a few days I will reach the halfway point: one more year left on my two-year contract; I still haven't decided whether to extend or PCS at the end of the tour. If I extend, it may be for one more year or continue on a rolling 90-day contract. Let's see what happens in the next few months.

Escape - although temporarily - from Kwajalein!

2010-07-10T14:17:00.000+12:00

The last few days before my vacation started flew by rapidly, and the Independence Day weekend was spent cleaning up and finishing packing for my trip back to the mainland. Five weeks of normal Stateside living!

MONDAY, 5 JULY 2010 Continental Micronesia (CS/CMI 956) KWA-MAJ-HNL
Boeing 737-824W (ETOPS) N14249 ('Air Mike')
ROUTING: KWA-OREEO-MAJ, then MAJ-R584-MANRE-R584-CHOKO-OPACA-OPACA4 (Decoded: Kwajalein, direct to Majuro via reporting point OREEO, then Majuro, via Route R584 through reporting points MANRE, CHOKO and OPACA, using the Honolulu OPACA4 standard instrument arrival.)

The Kwaj air terminal is ancient (originally built in 1957) and reminds one of flying out of a third world terminal. It's slated to be replaced, but like any military construction process... there never is enough money to go around. Took off on time at around 17:50 Kwaj time for the brief stopover in Majuro (MAJ/PKMJ) an hour later.

Air Mike 956 is the eastbound "Island Hopper", originating in Guam (GUM/PGUM), then to Chuuk (Truk) (TKK/PTKK), Pohnpei (PNI/PTPN), Kosrae (KSA/PTSA), Kwajalein (KWA/PKWA), Majuro (MAJ/PKMJ) before making the long hop to Honolulu (HNL/PHNL). After a brief, rainy stop in Majuro for a security sweep after allowing passengers terminating in Majuro to exit the aircraft, we took off for the 4-1/2 hour flight to Honolulu over a dark, featureless Pacific Ocean. (The Island Hopper used to stop at Johnston Island before it closed down; once a restricted military installation like Kwaj, it's now a wildlife sanctuary.) Arrived in Honolulu at around 02:00 Honolulu time. Landed on HNL Runway 8L.

5 JULY 2010 United Airlines (UA/UAL) 72 HNL-SFO
Boeing 767-322 N673UA
ROUTING: HNL MKK4 CLUTS R465 CUNDU R465 CINNY TIPP TOE VISUAL 28L SFO
(Decoded: Honolulu, using the MOLOKAI4 standard instrument departure via Route R465 through reporting points CLUTS, CUNDU and CINNY before handoff to the SFO TIPP TOE VISUAL 28L approach.)

After clearing U.S. Immigration and Customs in Honolulu, I had to wait in a deserted airport terminal until the USDA agricultural inspection station opened at 5 am (all baggage to the mainland must be screened for prohibited fruits, vegetables and plants). Past the security checkpoint and schlepped my ass to the Diamond Head concourse. Bought a one-time pass for the United Red Carpet Club and killed a little time and had some coffee and bagels before boarding the flight to SFO.

Took off from the Reef Runway (8R/26L) for another 4-1/2 hours of featureless Pacific Ocean. Eventually, the west coast of California appeared and we flew over Moffett Federal Airfield (NUQ/KNUQ) on final approach to SFO. (It's easy to spot Moffett Field - it has some of the largest hangars in the world, once used to house dirigibles.) San Francisco International has one of the trickiest landing approaches; compounded by close-in parallel runways and fickle Bay Area weather.

5 JULY 2010 United Express (UA/UAL) 6425 (operated by SkyWest) SFO-LAS
Canadair CRJ-700 N795SK
ROUTING: SFO PORTE3 CZQ BIH J92 BTY SUNST2 LAS
(Decoded: San Francisco via the PORTE3 standard instrument departure via the Clovis VORTAC (Fresno, California) through the Bishop, California VOR via Airway J92 to the Beatty, Nevada, VORTAC to the SUNST2 standard instrument arrival to Las Vegas.)
After an hour's layover in SFO (nice terminal!) we took off to the north and looped around the peninsula before heading southwest over the snow-capped Sierra Nevadas and the desert before landing on LAS Runway 7R (first time for me). After 24 hours, five time zones and losing a day crossing the International Date Line I finally made it to Las Vegas! Met my mother and younger brother at the baggage claim, then made a beeline for a cold beer at my brother's favorite watering hole, Money Plays. Arrived home but didn't get to sleep until very late (or was it early Kwaj time?)

And now to enjoy my vacation! I'll post when I can.

Down the home stretch...

2010-06-29T00:51:00.000+12:00

Seven more days and a wake-up before I fly out of Kwaj on home leave. It's hard to believe that only a couple of months ago I bought the plane tickets and now I'm preparing to pack my bags for a little over a month away from this island paradise.

It's not going to be all fun and games. I have to do some work, like establishing my Nevada residency by registering my car (which I haven't driven in nearly a year!), switching my driver's license from Texas to Nevada, and sorting through stuff I own to either throw out or place in self-storage; the storage costs get reimbursed by the company, and either my family or I have access to the storage area, but the only drawback is that I don't get the move of my stored goods in self-storage paid for by the company when it comes time to PCS back to the mainland. I can live with that.

I don't particularly like living or vacationing in Las Vegas during the blazing hot summer, where temperatures routinely break the 100-degree mark daily, but it's when I could swing the vacation to time it with the upcoming high school class reunion in Fort Lauderdale. Having already lived in Las Vegas and experienced the blast-furnace heat (twenty years earlier, with occasional visits every 1-2 years to visit my younger brother) I'm already prepared for it.

The biggest ordeal will be the travel: a little over 24 hours flying through mostly vast expanses of empty Pacific Ocean. After departing Kwajalein and making a brief stop in Majuro, the flight continues on towards Honolulu. As we cross the International Date Line at the 180 degree line of east longitude, I'll experience a time warp: I lose a day traveling eastward, so I'll be experiencing the longest July 5th in my life.

After clearing immigration and customs in Honolulu, I'll have about four hours to kill in the terminal before checking into my connecting flight to San Francisco. The wait shouldn't be too bad; I bought a one-time day pass to the United Airlines Red Carpet Club, so at least I'll have a little time to relax and have a continental breakfast before going to my gate. I learned that from a previous job where I did more traveling on the company's dime that it's worth getting a membership (or at least buy a one-time pass) if your connecting time is greater than two hours.

Another five hours in the air and I'll be landing at San Francisco International Airport (first time I've ever flown there); after about an hour connection I board a third flight for my final leg to Las Vegas, arriving at McCarran at around 5:50 pm Pacific time. Most flights from California usually use the runway 1/19 complex that runs northeast to southwest at the western part of the airport (flights to and from the east coast and international use the runway 7/25 complex that runs roughly east and west).

This past weekend was a full moon weekend, and it certainly was crazy at Vets' Hall. A couple of people had their PCS party, combined with karaoke night. At times, it was practically standing room only inside the Caribou Lounge and the back porch. I think the full moon also brought the craziness to a high level; many were well on their way - or already were - blasted off their minds.

I'll write in more detail my travel experience next week.

Two weeks to go...

2010-06-21T22:07:00.000+12:00

Counting down the days... it's hard to believe that two weeks from today I'll be boarding the Island Hopper (Air Mike flight 956) to begin my home leave back on the mainland. Bills paid, last-minute gifts purchased and took out my suitcases out of the closet to air them out and begin packing.

Thursday I'll be flying up to Roi to begin cross-training into the configuration auditor job with my co-worker. Mostly it'll be comparing microfiche aperture cards to scanned drawings in the drawing server repository; if the scan isn't up to snuff or missing, we rescan it. Eventually my co-worker's contract will end in November, unless he extends for a specific period or goes the 'rolling 90'. While the job market back in the mainland is getting a little better, I'm still a little leery of going back unless there are decent job opportunities at home. Because the auditor job requires unescorted entry into 'closed areas', I will probably be put in for processing for a SECRET security clearance. (I had one in the Air Force, and again about 12 years ago when I worked on a project to update floor and site plans for the Alternate Joint Communications Center in Raven Rock Mountain, Pennsylvania.)

There is also a possibility that my job may relocate to Huntsville, Alabama as the transition to the new remote operations center there ramps up. When that will happen, I don't know. It could be anywhere from a year or two down the road; if it is offered to me, I will seriously consider it, if the relocation package is right. Technical jobs appear to be easier to get in Huntsville than Las Vegas, where gaming and other service industries supporting the casino industry rule. I've visited Huntsville twice before; the first time in 1988 to attend and compete in the National Association of Rocketry's annual meet (NARAM-30), the second in 1999 to attend a U.S. Army Corps of Engineers course. I liked what I saw about the town back then.

Now to begin thinking of what to do after I return from home leave in August. I need to get up off my sorry ass and get motivated to take some college or technical courses to finish up my associate's degree. I also need to finish USAF Squadron Officer School by correspondence. I might save up some money and take scuba diving lessons; everyone I know who's a diver out here highly recommends it.

Glory Trip 200

2010-06-17T10:15:00.000+12:00

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
June 16, 2010
Release No. 06-0510

VANDENBERG CONDUCTS MINUTEMAN III FLIGHT TEST

VANDENBERG AIR FORCE BASE, Calif. - A scheduled Minuteman III intercontinental ballistic missile test was launched here at 3:01 a.m. June 16 from Launch Facility-10.

The flight test was the first for the 576th Flight Test Squadron since its realignment under Air Force Global Strike Command.

The missile's single re-entry test vehicle traveled approximately 4,190 miles before hitting its pre-determined target near the Kwajalein Atoll in the Marshall Islands.

"Team Vandenberg's coordination was phenomenal resulting in a seamless launch operation," said Col. Steven Winters, the 30th Space Wing vice commander and Launch Decision Authority.

MMIII missiles launched from Vandenberg carry sophisticated data collection equipment, according to Col. Carl DeKemper, the 576th FLTS commander. ICBM analysts, including the Department of Defense and the Department of Energy, will use the data collected from this mission for continuing force development evaluation.

"For more than 50 years, Vandenberg has been at the forefront of testing and improving ICBMs to ensure the readiness and reliability of our fleet," said Col. DeKemper. "Our team is dedicated to ensuring a safe, secure and effective combat-ready ICBM force."

It was shortly after 10:00 pm Wednesday night in Kwaj when we received notice of the launch of GT-200 via a 'crawl' message on AFN-TV. It takes about 20 or so minutes for the RV to complete its flight, ending in a spectacular light show as it streaks over Kwajalein Lagoon. I jumped onto my bike and raced up Ocean Road to North Point.

Sure enough, about five minutes after arriving in North Point, we saw what at first appeared to be lightning on the horizon, though it quickly became brighter. As the RV (reentry vehicle) became visible below the cloud layer it was a bright, glowing fireball streaking to the northwest. No sound, no sonic boom. (Long-exposure still pictures of other tests show the RVs as bright streaks in the sky.) And as quickly as it appeared, the show was over. Back on my bike and to my BQ to get some sleep.

A Glory Trip (or GT as it's abbreviated) begins by selecting an active missile from the ICBM missile fields in the northern United States. The missile is removed from its silo (another one takes its place) and returned to the base, where the RV containing the nuclear warhead is removed. The missile is then shipped to Vandenberg AFB near Lompoc, California; it then receives a new RV with special test instrumentation and a destruct package to terminate the missile's flight if something goes wrong. A typical launch and maintenance crew from the wing that 'donated' the missile for the test maintains the missile in operational status for the test. For some tests, a launch crew aboard an E-6 Mercury command and control aircraft acts as an airborne launch control center. In the unlikely event that the ground launched control centers are nuked out of existence or are unable to operate, the ALCC can take over if necessary.

At the appointed hour, the launch crew turns keys and the Minuteman III roars out of its silo in a column of flame and smoke. Over 4000 miles and nearly 25 minutes later, the residents on Kwaj get treated to the light show, although it is said that if the RV was a live nuke, it would be the last thing anyone would see before being obliterated in a nuclear explosion.

Because of the highly sensitive (and classified) nature of operational weapons testing, very little detail will emerge of the flight test, other than it was a success as described in the news release above.

New choppers arrive...

2010-06-12T13:54:00.000+12:00

Last Sunday a C-17 flew in all the way from Columbus AFB, Mississippi and delivered four brand new UH-72 Lakota helicopters to replace three aging UH-1 Hueys (among the last in active U.S. Army service). The UH-72s are the workhorses of Kwajalein, transporting, passengers and equipment to the outer islands within Kwajalein Atoll.

By Tuesday, the new choppers had all their packing material removed, main rotor assembled and began familiarization and functional check flights for the flight crews. (All the pilots are civilian contractors flying for Berry Aviation in San Marcos, Texas, under subcontract to KRS.) Once cleared to operate, the Hueys will slowly disappear, probably to a scrap yard. Gonna miss seeing Army Helicopters 240 (all olive drab), 382 (olive green white top, probably a former VIP chopper) and 447 (white with olive drab tail boom) beat the air into submission as they clawed their way into the air. The UH-72 is a much quieter helicopter than the Huey, with its distinctive 'thwop' to its rotor blades. (I broke my helicopter 'cherry' on 240 back in December.)

The new helicopters are smaller but are state of the art with digital 'glass' instrumentation and autopilot, but carry fewer passengers than the Huey, so it won't be unusual for two choppers to be dispatched. Much easier to maintain than the old Hueys.

To make them easier to see in the water, all the helicopters are painted international orange (leading someone to already dub them 'flying pumpkins') and include automatically-deployable floats on the skids. And to make things even easier for this airplane geek to keep track, all the new helicopters have sequential serial numbers: 07-2101 thrrough 07-2104 (painted as 72101 through 72104 on the aircraft).

I've got some pictures of the new choppers in action but will wait until I get home next month to upload them to the blog.

Sorry... no mail today!

2010-06-11T16:09:00.000+12:00

Normally, mail is delivered on Tuesdays and Thursdays on the Air Transport International flight from Honolulu except on the second Thursday of the month, when there is no ATI flight. A C-17 from Hickam usually delivers mail and cargo on the second Saturday. However, due to unforeseen circumstances the C-17 flight is delayed 72 hours, so it's arriving on Tuesday, along with ATI's Tuesday flight and Air Mike's Island Hopper. It's gonna be a Mongolian cluster fuck of epic proportions on the Kwaj ramp... the passenger service reps at the terminal I know are not looking forward to Tuesday!

Not expecting much except for a couple of orders I placed a couple of weeks ago which should be on the plane Tuesday. Likewise, I'm not going to order anything between now and the next couple of weeks, since I will be going off island on home leave. I'll save my money to do the serious shopping when I'm back on the mainland.

All mail sent to military APOs and FPOs (Army/Air Force and Fleet (Navy/Marines) Post Offices) are sorted in military postal facilities, normally Travis AFB, California for the Pacific and McGuire AFB, New Jersey for Europe and 'downrange' (Iraq and Afghanistan). They are then placed on Air Mobility Command aircraft (military or contract carrier) to the postal center nearest the location; in our case it's Honolulu (Hickam AFB). Finally it's loaded onto the ATI or the C-17 to Kwaj, space available. Delivery guarantees do not apply to packages sent to APOs or FPOs. Depending on timing, it takes an average of two weeks for a package to arrive in Kwaj.

Chow hall grumbling...

2010-06-10T08:09:00.000+12:00

Back to another full week of work in paradise... get up, shower, have breakfast, ride the bus to the other side of the island, work for eight hours (with an hour-long lunch break), back on the bus, grab some dinner and back home.

For most of us on an unaccompanied contract, we get an adequate room to sleep in and three meals at Cafe Pacific as part of our compensation package. Unfortunately, meal quality at the PDR (Pacific Dining Room, the official name for the chow hall) varies widely. Sometimes, you get a good meal, other times it flat out sucks. Of course, we have the option to eat at the AAFES snack bar but you gotta pay. Or you can buy groceries at Surfway or the shoppette and try carefully cooking up a meal in your BQ without burning it down - or play it safe and cook in the ARC kitchen. I've reached an average level of proficiency cooking in my BQ room (and I was a former cook when I was in the Air Force); it's amazing how you can perform miracles with a George Foreman grill, microwave and a small electric skillet.

Budget cuts have taken their toll on the PDR... the building is badly in need of serious repair or replacement, the food budget has been cut severely, and you just can't please everyone's palate. Add the typical island attitude and there you have it... a major sticking point with unaccompanied personnel. Accompanied personnel (families) have kitchens in their homes; they generally do not get a meal card.

Fine dining options are non-existent on Kwaj... what passed for fancy dining ended in 2008 with the closing of the Yokwe Yuk club; another victim of aging infrastructure and budget cuts. The old Yuk now sits closed and waiting for the inevitable wrecker's ball; the new Kwaj hospital is supposedly being built in its place. A poor substitute is the 'mobile kitchen' night on Emon Beach or the country club; personally it's a little too much money to pay for table service and be served food barely above chow hall quality. Lousy food is but one of the many reasons so many don't renew their contracts after their initial two years are up. I've learned to live with it; while I might grumble about food quality or island life in general from time to time on this blog the good usually outweighs the bad.

But one benefit of getting off the island (either on vacation or TDY) is the variety of dining choices, especially in Honolulu. I've really come to enjoy Asian and Pacific Island cuisine, especially Hawaiian food. I've already told my mother that the first stop after picking me up from the airport is the nearest In-N-Out Burger location for a Double Double and fries 'animal style' (from their 'secret menu' which really isn't that much of a secret).

Twenty-five days and counting (or twenty-four and a wake up) before home leave!

Things to do, places to go, people to see...

2010-06-04T09:28:00.000+12:00

Now that there is only thirty-one days before I go on home leave (yes, I'm keeping track of it on my 'short-timer's calendar!) comes the fun part: what to do with myself with almost six weeks of leave back on the mainland!

First order of business is officially making myself a permanent resident of the state of Nevada... get my driver's license, insurance, car tags and voter registration. Then I've gotta go through my stuff that made it through the move and get it placed in storage. I'm probably going to go the self-storage route and have the rental reimbursed by the company. Once all that is done, then I'll have time to kick back and relax like a local Las Vegan. Might go to Nellis AFB and shop at the BX. (Contractors stationed overseas are extended unlimited BX, commissary and MWR (morale, welfare and recreation) privileges.) I'll be sending much of what I buy stateside via mail to Kwaj.

Late in the evening of July 14th, my mother, younger brother and I will be taking the red-eye nonstop to Fort Lauderdale for the Rockin' 80s-90s Pioneer reunion; a multi-year class reunion for alumni of North Miami Senior High School. Will probably do some sightseeing in the area, since it's been more than five years since I was in the South Florida area. Hopefully, I might take one last drive by the old senior high school, slated for demolition this summer (a new high school to replace the old was built two blocks south and opened in the fall of 2009). Back late in the evening of the 19th.

Capping off the tail end of my home leave is flying back to Honolulu and spending four days as a tourist before getting on the Island Hopper back to Kwaj. Touring Pearl Harbor, Waikiki and a few other places on O'ahu is in the works.

I also received word that as of July 1, I'm eligible to pin on the grade of major in Civil Air Patrol. Guess I've gotta go to the military clothing sales store and buy me a new service cap for my service dress uniform. (Majors and above have four clouds and lightning bolts - the Air Force equivalent of 'scrambled eggs' - on the visor of the service cap; brigadier generals and above wear six. They are commonly known as 'farts and darts' in the Air Force.) After that it's four long years before I'm eligible to pin on the grade of lieutenant colonel, which is the highest grade a regular senior member can attain in CAP, unless selected to serve as a wing commander; that position is for a full colonel. (Even then, the first year of wearing Lt Col is a probationary period, after which it is up to the region commander to make the silver oak leaves permanent.)

The general officer grades in CAP are practically impossible for an average member to earn; only the national vice commander (brigadier general) and national commander (major general) get to put stars on their shoulders. If they successfully complete their term of office, they keep the stars.

And now, back to work... it ain't gonna do itself!

Memorial Day weekend

2010-06-02T11:00:00.000+12:00

After a long drought without a three-day holiday (last one being Presidents' Day in February), the summer season kicks off in earnest on Memorial Day weekend. Because of our work schedules most of us observe the holiday on Tuesday, June 1st. The Class of 2010 of Kwajalein High School graduates this weekend and soon will be heading to the mainland to begin their college studies. (They have 90 days to leave the island once they finish school, unless they manage to get a contract job on their own.)

Saturday night was the 'Zombie Prom' at Vets' Hall; the place was decorated and many attendees were dressed in their 'zombie best'; a good time was had by all.

The next day the American Legion Post 44 rifle squad was issued their M-1 Garand rifles and practiced the moves required to fire the traditional three rifle volleys over the grave. Although the rifles and blank ammunition belong to the Legion post, the prohibition on personal firearms on island require that we store the weapons and ammo at the KPD armory and notify the Provost Marshal (the top military cop). This was my first time handling an M-1, and the marching cadence I learned as a CAP cadet was quite true: 'M-1, caliber thirty, mighty heavy, mighty dirty!' After a few dry runs to get ourselves familiarized with the weapon, we loaded clips with seven blank rounds. The rifles did not have blank firing adapters so the spent gas could not retract the bolt and eject the spent shell as it was fired, so we resorted to manually charging the rifle after each volley. I remembered to bring some ear plugs to lessen the assault on my eardrums from the shots. One other benefit abut firing blanks was there was no recoil. (I was told the recoil on a 30 caliber was a little harder than that of an M-16, which uses a smaller round.)

Monday morning dawned bright and sunny, with a little 'liquid sunshine' - a light drizzle - as we reported to Vets' Hall and were transported to Flagpole Hill at the south end of the island by the terminal for the ceremony. Thankfully, the rain lasted only a short time. All of us wore jeans, dark shoes, polo shirts with the American Legion emblem and the legend 'AMERICAN LEGION POST 44 RIFLE TEAM' and matching baseball caps. We stationed ourselves at the top of the hill in front of the cross marking the approximate location of the grave where the captured Marines from the Makin Island raid were executed by the Japanese in 1943.

The ceremony began promptly at 9:00 am with the playing of the national anthems of the Marshall Islands and the 'Star-Spangled Banner'; at the first note of the music we all assumed 'Present Arms' and held it until commanded 'Order Arms' when the music finished playing. After a short speech by the president of KRS, Dave Norwood (a retired Army colonel) and a wreath laying at the base of the flagpoles, it was our turn to do our solemn duty:

'PRE-SENT, ARMS! ORDER, ARMS! HALF-RIGHT, FACE! PORT, ARMS! READY! AIM! FIRE! AIM! FIRE! AIM! FIRE!'

A lone bugler (from the Kwajalein Community Band) then played the mournful notes of 'Taps'. After a brief benediction from the post chaplain, the ceremony ended and we were dismissed. We quickly proceeded to police up our spent brass - making sure there were no live blank rounds - and gave the spent brass to some of the kids. After securing the rifles we drove back to Vets' Hall and proceeded to help out with the cooking preparations for the veterans' lunch at 11:30. We still had plenty of leftovers from the Mongolian BBQ the previous weekend so we fired up the grills and cooked it up. After the lunch, we cleaned up the hall and had a few beers between ourselves; I finally got back to my BQ about 7:00 pm and immediately hit the rack; I was thoroughly exhausted from the day's events.

As a veteran of the U.S. Air Force, I'm proud to have done my patriotic duty with the rifle squad, and proud to also share the day with my fellow veterans at the American Legion. I wouldn't hesitate to do it again.

Parole's getting closer...

2010-05-26T15:12:00.000+12:00

Just a little over 4-1/2 weeks before I board Air Mike 956 to go on home leave. I've been waiting for months for it to get here - guess I'm suffering from a case of 'rock fever'! I really like this place but there are times you just want to get away from it all.

Completed my home leave itinerary by purchasing the plane ticket from Las Vegas to Fort Lauderdale for the Rockin' 80s-90s Pioneer reunion. Unlike class-year specific reunions, this reunion invites classmates from the classes of 1980 up until the early 90s.Unlike the stress factory that was when I planned my 20-year reunion for my class (North Miami (Florida) Senior High School Class of 1983) in 2003, all my involvement in this reunion is mainly providing advice to the planner - she's a Class of '84 alum.

The economic downturn and changing attitudes make it harder to plan single-class year reunions; traditionally there were the 5-year (rare), 10-year, 20-year, 25-year and 30-year; beyond that the aging of classmates makes it harder to hold one unless one considers a multi-year reunion.

I don't go down to my old stomping grounds in South Florida much anymore; while I have friends and classmates who still live in the area, the old neighborhood has changed completely over the years. When I was growing up in North Miami it was largely a predominantly white and Jewish neighborhood. We didn't have bake sales for fundraisers, we had bagel sales! Nothing like the smell of freshly baked bagels in the classroom halls in the morning. Today, the neighborhood's demographics have totally changed, it is now largely black and Haitian; many of the whites that lived in the neigborhood moved out to Broward County.

I really enjoyed my senior year in high school; one assignment in my senior English class was to write a journal. Although the assignment was for only a few weeks I soon expanded it to chronicle almost every day of my senior year. Twenty years later, I dusted off the manuscript and expanded it to book form. This became Senior Year: Memories of the Class of 1983 of North Miami Senior High School. I published it to commemorate the Class of 1983's 20-year reunion. No, it'll never make the best sellers list, and you can forget about a future movie or TV show about it. But if you want to buy a copy, it's available through Amazon.com. I still get a royalty check once in a while from my publisher, but it isn't enough for me to quit my day job - rather, it's good to cover a round of beers at Vets' Hall.

Vets' Hall Mongolian BBQ

2010-05-25T09:12:00.000+12:00

After months of planning, the Vets' Hall resurrected a Kwaj tradition that was last held about eight years ago - the Mongolian BBQ. For those not familiar with the Mongolian BBQ concept, you select the sauces, meats and vegetables and then take them to a grill to be stir-fried. Usually accompanied with rice (steamed or fried). Mongolian BBQ Wikipedia article.

I biked over to Vets' Hall Saturday evening for a few hours to get the cold sauces bottled (shoyu - soy sauce - as it is commonly known around here), oyster sauce, sesame oil, and a few others, then came back around 10:00 am Sunday to begin cooking the other sauces in earnest. Sugar water, lemon water, lime water, ginger water, and finally the oils - hot pepper and garlic oils. Oils do take a lot longer to cool than the waters, so I know the next time I'll make them earlier in the prep day so that they are not too warm for pouring into squeeze bottles for serving. (I didn't have a problem with hot oil potentially softening the bottles - I let them cool down enough until just before showtime.)

At 5:30 pm, the crowds began to arrive, and we had a large but steady turnout. During the meal, I largely kept an eye on the serving area, making sure that sauces were not running out (none did except for one experimental one I created from a Korean BBQ sauce mix. Not bad but I need to try a different method next time. Dinner closed around 8:30 as the local band - the 'Insane Gecko Posse' - entertained the crowd. The remaining meats and vegetables on the serving table were then sent to the grill so we could offer a discounted 'late plate' for late night revelers. Some may have complained about the cost - $40 per person, kids half price, which included free drinks (some beers and well drinks at the bar for the adults, soft drinks for the kids) but the price was comparable to the prices usually charged for the mobile kitchen dinners served up at Emon Beach and the Country Club. Part of the proceeds went to fund the post's scholarship fund, after expenses. After cleaning up and helping a couple of people who had a little too much to drink get in our van so they wouldn't wind up a target for KPD and a potential public intoxication ticket, I finally crawled into bed, thoroughly exhausted at around 1:30 in the morning on Monday. Needless to say I didn't do much but sleep and do some minor clean up in my BQ room when I got up a few hours later.

All in all, the Mongolian BBQ was a success, and we're planning to hold one again in the fall, probably in the late October-early November timeframe.

A full week of work awaits, though next week we do have a holiday weekend, Memorial Day. I've been tapped to participate in the post rifle squad, armed with blank-firing M-1 rifles to provide the traditional three rifle volleys over the grave during the ceremony. Normally, possession of firearms is forbidden on the island; those that bring them must surrender them to the KPD armory for the duration of their tour; Vets' Hall owns their own rifles (a hold over from the days when individual possession of firearms was not a problem) but now keeps them in storage at the armory.

Less than five weeks to go before I go home on leave!

Some come and some go...

2010-05-18T13:35:00.000+12:00

As we get closer to the end of the school year some whose contracts are expiring are PCSing off the island. Some are replaced right away, other jobs may take weeks or months to get filled, depending on the hiring process. The school year is nearing its end as well, and many families prepare to take long vacations off the island. A few long-time Kwaj residents - one just did over 20 years on island - are also leaving.

One of them leaving is my mentor who, along with my sponsor, welcomed me to Kwaj back in August. His original two-year contract ended in January and he was on the 'rolling 90-day' contract extension when he was offered and accepted a job back stateside to be closer to his wife. (Once your original two-year contract is up, if you don't extend your contract for a specific time (one or two years) you revert to a rolling 90-day contract. As long as you give at least 90 days notice that you will not renew, you don't get penalized with a 'contract not complete' - where you have to foot the bill for the return airfare. Thankfully, they do pay for the packout and return of your household goods.) This week he finishes outprocessing and then he takes the 'freedom bird' back to stateside life Friday evening. Good luck and safe travels...

Coming up this weekend is the American Legion post's Mongolian Barbecue - yours truly got drafted to help prep the meats and vegetables and make up the cooking sauces. It hasn't been done on island for a few years and hopefully people will enjoy the return of a Kwaj tradition. The following week is the Memorial Day weekend and I'm part of the post's rifle team; they do the traditional three volleys at the hill near the flagpoles by the terminal. It's followed by a members and veterans-only reception at the Vets' Hall.

As for me I still have 15 months left on my contract; it's still too soon whether I will decide on either extending for one or two years, going the 'rolling nineties' or simply pack up and go back home to Vegas. So far, I like it out here; I may be out in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere, but the Kwaj experience is unique.

Finally got my teeth!

2010-05-10T11:26:00.000+12:00

After a little over five months of healing, fitting and carefully watching what I ate, I received my dentures on Saturday. They fit well and probably will need a little tweaking (which will be done Tuesday at the dental hobby shop) but overall I've had no problems. Of course, I have to 'retrain' my mouth to speak with teeth again; for the next few weeks I may be slurring my words, so those of you on island that know me please don't think I'm hitting the bottle on a daily basis! It does feel good to smile again, and I'm not one who smiles much.

Bills paid, bought my airport transfer in Honolulu - with lei greeting (hey, I'm playing tourist before going back to work!) included. I may rent a car for a day or so to go places the tour buses won't go, such as shopping at the Hickam BX (a privilege extended to civilian contractors woking for the military overseas, along with commissary and AFRC - Armed Forces Recreation Centers - resorts) and a few other recommended grindz joints (restaurants, in Hawaiian pidgin) not on the Waikiki trolley routes. The high cost of gas and lack of available parking in Hawaii doesn't make it really feasible to rent a car. I've already heard about how bad the traffic is on the freeways there during the work week.

Going home to Vegas in the height of summer is not gonna be a comfortable one - days with high temperatures of well over 100 degrees are common, and it doesn't cool off to about the high 70s-low 80s until very late into the night or early in the morning. I'm already accustomed to it - I used to live there about 20 years ago.

Two months to go... (or where did all the time go?)

2010-05-01T06:36:00.000+12:00

Nearly nine months ago I was JOJ (Just off the Jet) in Kwajalein, with that particular new guy deer-in-the-headlights look. As I've adjusted to island life over the months I now begin to look forward to home leave in July and a taste of real civilization back in the mainland.

Plane ticket Kwaj to Vegas - check... hotel in Hono on the return... check. All that's left is buying the plane ticket Vegas to Fort Lauderdale for the reunion and getting a couple of days worth of rent a car in Hono.

Now to sort out through some items to sell at the Great Kwaj Swap Meet on Monday morning... don't expect much money for 'em but I could use some extra closet space! :)

Ready for another weekend to begin!

2010-04-24T15:05:00.000+12:00

Just a few hours left before pau hana and the weekend. Couple of hours volunteer work at the library, then slide down the stairs to the bowling alley for the 3-6-9 no-tap bowling tournament. (For those who don't bowl, a 3-6-9 no-tap works like this: automatic strike awarded on the third, sixth and ninth frame; if on the first roll you leave one pin standing, it counts as a strike as well.). And then - if I'm not too tired - I'll swing by Vets' Hall and throw down a few beers.

Yesterday at the American Legion post meeting I was nominated to be the Post Service Officer for 2010-2011. The PSO is there to help veterans navigate through the bureaucratic labyrinth of paperwork required for veterans to process their benefits or disability claims. Within our post I was told I would have the additional duty to welcome transient aircrew RON (remaining overnight) in Kwaj and open up Vets' Hall for a cold beer or two if they happen to land on a night the hall is not normally open - if they elect to do so. Elections are next month and I'm looking forward to serving.

Booked my hotel in Honolulu for the three days and four nights I'll be staying when I return to Kwaj from home leave in August. Don't need a fancy hotel with a beachfront view; I see plenty of it every day when I leave the Sands BQ to go to work - it's only about 50 yards to oceanside. It's close by the Ala Moana mall and a short trolley or bus ride to Waikiki proper. I'm staying at the The Equus Hotel and Marina Tower, near the Ala Wai boat harbor, and not far from the Ilikai Hotel - for Hawaii Five-O fans, it's where Jack Lord is introduced in the opening credits at the hotel's penthouse balcony. (There is a bronze bust of the late Jack Lord outside Kahala Mall in Honolulu.)

Considering the high price of gasoline on O'ahu I'm going to probably rely on 'Frank Fasi's Limo Service' (aka The Bus - nicknamed after the late Honolulu mayor who introduced it) for most of my sojourns in and around Waikiki and the neighboring area, probably renting a car for a day or two if I want to travel out to the North Shore. But if a tour has transportation, I'll probably take it.

Onolicious grindz!

2010-04-23T10:29:00.000+12:00

After spending the better part of nearly a week sidelined with a stomach flu bug going around the island, I'm now somewhat back to my normal self.

I'm definitely about to have me a food orgy those four days I'm in Honolulu coming back from home leave. I've had the opportunity of trying out different Asian foods while in Kwaj, and keep up with the Honolulu foodie scene on several online blogs, mainly The Tasty Island . I better starve for a couple of days before chowing down... there's so many varied places to eat out in Hono! Because once I get back to Kwaj, it's back to the fare at the PDR!

On the other hand, Las Vegas is no slouch when it comes to Hawaiian and other Asian foods... there's quite a large Asian population out there, and the big casinos on the Strip go out of their way to cater to Asian high rollers.

Post meeting at Vets' Hall tonight - finalizing preparations for the Mongolian BBQ next month. Hasn't been done in several years, used to be a big fundraiser for the American Legion.

Quiet Sunday in Kwaj... for now!

2010-04-18T15:22:00.001+12:00

Called it an early night at Vets' Hall last night. Just didn't feel good - something I ate earlier must have violently disagreed with my digestive system - and I didn't want to aggravate it with copious amounts of alcohol. Much better now.

Cooked up some breakfast - lots better fare than the PDR - and after cleaning up the 'kitchen' area set about to clean up my room while listening to my favorite vice - movie soundtracks. I have varied music tastes depending on my mood... anywhere from heavy metal to classical.

It must run in the family; my late grandfather used to collect Broadway musical soundtracks that he taped onto reel-to-reel tape. Sadly, they were never played again after his death and were probably disposed of after my grandmother passed away in 2000. I started collecting them in earnest during my teenage years with vinyl soundtracks of the James Bond films. When the CD came along, most of the vinyl LPs went digital for me. In the early 90s I found I wasn't alone and there was a loyal following of film music fans on the Internet. I now have some rare soundtracks that I wisely copied into MP3 files (the originals are safely home!) that I either listen to on my laptop or on my MP3 player. (One of them, the original soundtracks to the films The Poseidon Adventure and The Towering Inferno command high prices in the secondary collectors' market (read: eBay).

Probably the most well known film soundtracks are from the James Bond films - every film since the series made its debut on the silver screen in 1962 has a unique sound that complements the film. The use of contemporary artists performing the film's main titles (only three films had an instrumental-only main title: Dr. No, From Russia With Love and On Her Majesty's Secret Service) keeps the series fresh, at least from a musical standpoint. A few years ago most of the soundtracks were reissued, remastered and expanded from their original issue, and with the help of some basic sound-editing software and information from fellow film music fans I was able to create custom CDs with the music rearranged as it appeared on film. I created re-sequenced soundtracks for Thunderball, You Only Live Twice, On Her Majesty's Secret Service and Diamonds Are Forever. (Don't ask; they're not for sale; with a little searching on the Internet, you can put them together fairly easily. But for Kwaj Kats and Roi Rats, I usually make an exception.)

Other soundtracks I'm particularly fond of listening are those by Jerry Goldsmith (In Like Flint/Our Man Flint. The Man from U.N.C.L.E., The Blue Max and many others), Bill Conti* (The Right Stuff, Rocky), Lalo Schifrin (Mission: Impossible, Bullitt) and other artists.

[* Useless trivia: Bill Conti is an alum from my high school, North Miami Senior High School in North Miami, Florida. He graduated long before I did, in the Class of 1959. I graduated in 1983.]

Of course, being a rabid film music geek, I can tell you that the main title for From Russia With Love is slightly different than the one issued on the official soundtrack - the film version has a what sounds like a ballpark organ playing in the background. Or that Monty Norman gets official credit for composing the world-famous James Bond Theme, though it was reorchestrated by John Barry at the very last minute before the film premiered - the tropical-flavored music by Norman just didn't work for the producers.

And now to bike down to Vets' Hall and drop off some steaks and bratwursts to marinate and cook on the grill tonight.

Another weekend in paradise...

2010-04-17T15:22:00.000+12:00

Almost pau hana and my beer drinking hand is already twitching for a cold one (or three or four) at Vets' Hall tonight. Get me drunk enough, I might attempt to belt out some karaoke. I'm not quitting my day job for a singing career.

The final - and yes, I mean final - fitting for my dentures at the dental hobby shop was done today. (Not knocking my dentist - he's done a very professional job with the limited resources at hand here on Kwaj.)

Nice to see my new teeth are almost in final form in a wax mould. After some minor adjustments and bite registration (complete with gobs of foul-tasting dental putty) the wax moulds were promptly packed for shipment to the lab for final construction. They'll go out on Tuesday's ATI flight back to the mainland. In about another 5-6 weeks (by the end of May, hopefully) I'll have a new set of dentures. Could have been done sooner in the mainland or cheaper in the Philippines, but the extra time waiting helped to have my gums completely healed before the denture work began. And I didn't have to go off island on a dental referral.

Back to Vets' Hall on Sunday to help with the cooking for a PCS party. On Monday, going to go get my Marshall Islands drivers' license - mostly for souvenir purposes, since I don't have to drive a motor vehicle except when necessary on Kwaj.

Mission coming up next week... those directly supporting it are busting their asses to make it a success. I won't say much more about that.

Majuro and Ebeye are now lit with fiber on the new submarine cable; ours is still undergoing DIACAP (DoD Information Assurance Certification and Accreditation Process) certification before it's released to both the .mil and the public side. We might have high speed before too long! High speed junkies can take the ferry to Ebeye and go to the NTA (Marshall Islands National Telecommunications Authority) office and get 100 minutes of high speed connection for $10.00. I can live a little longer on dial-up speeds.

Eight months in Kwaj...

2010-04-14T08:06:00.000+12:00

... and loving every minute of it!

It's hard to believe that a little over a year ago I was absolutely miserable in my previous job. Suffice it to say that I put up with nearly two and a half years being abused, bullied, belittled and micromanaged on a daily basis, topped off with condescenscion from the management. It was not unusual for me to work 10 hour days - sometimes 12 - and the stress level was such that it was aggravating my diabetes and causing me to lose teeth (I eventually had to get dentures.) Eventually the situation came to a head and I pulled a seriously risky career move, considering the economy is in the shitter and jobs are hard to come by: I turned in my keys, access badge, wrote a brief, scathing resignation note (the sonofabitch was already gone for the day when I dropped it on his desk!) and walked out the door, never to return.

Since I voluntarily resigned, I couldn't get unemployment benefits (and even if they'd fired me, the company I worked for would have probably fought to keep me from getting any), so I lived off an early withdrawal from my 401k until I got the job in Kwajalein.

Fast forward a year later: my stress level is way down, I really love my job and I am enjoying life in paradise - smack dab in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere. Sure, I've put up with the occasional bout of homesickness, but that was promptly cured by getting to know the many people living and working on Kwaj. I'm looking forward to home leave in July, but that's only for six weeks before I get back to Kwajalein.

Cheeseburger in Paradise...

2010-04-13T08:47:00.000+12:00

Not surprisingly, we have a sizable group of 'Parrotheads' (fans of the music of and lifestyle promoted by Jimmy Buffett). So, on Sunday night (April 11th) Camp Hamilton Beach was transformed into Parrothead Central here on Kwaj. Plenty of margaritas, daiquiris, cheeseburgers in paradise and lots of cold Landshark lager beer, with lots of Jimmy Buffett and other tropical music. Some of us (including myself) took a dip in the placid waters of Kwajalein lagoon, watching the sunset and wasting away the day in Kwajaritaville. Plenty of beach games (with team names that were downright raunchy and debauched... you get the meaning ;)) such as coconut toss, beach bowling, hermit crab races helped pass the time with good friends.

Party ended sometime around midnight for me, and I was treated to the scariest bike ride of my life. I'd forgotten my bike light. South of Vets' Hall there are no street lights at night (for safety purposes so landing pilots don't line up on Lagoon Road instead of the runway; while it's rare we do get an occasional military flight in at night for a 'gas-and-go' refuel). Discretion being the better part of valor, I walked my bike on the dirt trails until I reached the paved Lagoon Road, then hopped on my bike once I got to a well- lit spot. Lesson learned: never again. (And didn't get busted by Kwaj Five-O for not having a bike light on me south of 9th Street after dark. More importantly, I didn't fall off my bike...)

Mail fairy was good to me Monday. The monthly C-17 flights on the second Saturday usually brings lots of packages, and I received five of them from orders I put in about two to three weeks earlier.

'Thump' Day... and April Fool's Day

2010-04-01T15:10:00.000+12:00

While 'hump day' is traditionally on Wednesday in CONUS (CONtinental US - another military abbreviation used freely out here) the middle of the week for us is on Thursday, or 'Thump Day' as it's sometimes called out here. Second ATI flight delivering mail and cargo came in... might have some packages waiting for me at the post office pau hana.

Got my travel request approved for home leave, now all I need to do is get it to the travel office so they can cut my travel orders. (Otherwise they won't let me leave - or come back to - the island come July!) Still early, but not leaving anything to chance at the last minute. A little over three months and counting before the Freedom Bird takes me home!

Spring Break Music Festival

2010-03-29T21:33:00.000+12:00

Every year around the time of spring break for Kwajalein schools (usually around the last week of March) the Kwajalein Spring Break Music Festival brings out the best in local musical talent. Several local bands such as Zooks, the Insane Gecko Posse and Pure Polynesia performed live on the stage at Emon Beach. The clubs and individuals on island bring out their wares to sell (one can never have enough T-shirts, koozies and other knick-knacks around here) and there is a chili cookoff, shave ice, homebrewed beers and assorted pupus for sale, though many will camp out early to stake out a good spot on the beach.

While it was breezy, the sun was quite hot for most of the day. I hung out with a few people I knew and enjoyed a late picnic dinner while sucking down cold beers. Unfortunately on the ride back my bike lost one of its pedals at the crank; luckily I was sober and not traveling very fast so I was able to slow to a stop without crashing on Lagoon Road by the dental hobby shop. Recovered my missing pedal and walked the bike back to my BQ without attracting any undue attention from Kwaj Five-O - and they were definitely on the prowl this weekend. Brought it back to the bike guys at Macy's West for a fix in the morning.

Bought my plane ticket for home leave on Saturday; $1550.20 lighter in my bank account later I guaranteed my 'parole' from 'Kwajatraz' this July. Departing Kwaj in the late afternoon of July 5th, and arriving in Honolulu in the early morning hours (2 am) of the same day (after crossing the International Date Line), then connecting with a United Airlines flight at 7 am to San Francisco. A third connection in San Francisco finally gets me into Las Vegas at around 5:30 pm.

Coming back on August 2 through Honolulu, where I will stay for three days before getting back on the Island Hopper to Kwajalein.

KJ6GHO

2010-03-24T16:24:00.000+12:00

After waiting a good week and a half, I checked the FCC's Universal Licensing Service database to see what the status was on my amateur radio call sign. Lo and behold, it's been issued! I've been assigned the call sign KJ6GHO.

I can only exercise Technician class privileges at the moment, but am studying for the General class, the next higher privilege level. I'm also in the process of applying for a concurrent Marshall Islands amateur radio license as well.

Now to save up the money for a decent hand-held radio that'll work on the Technician bands...

Met Rocket

2010-03-16T16:00:00.001+12:00

Occasionally, launches of small meteorological sounding rockets take place on Launch Hill on the western end of Kwaj. For the model rocketeers (spacemodelers in Europe and everywhere else) we usually launch PWN-11D Super Loki-Dart sounding rockets for meteorological observations; larger sounding rockets launch from Roi or Meck. Scale modelers can obtain documentation for building a flying model of the Super Loki-Dart through National Association of Rocketry Technical Services (NARTS).

(EDIT 3/20/2010: I stand corrected. On further research, it turns out that the met rockets launched were Viper IIIA boosters with the PWN-12A inflatable sphere dart. The Viper IIIA is a larger version of the Super Loki-Dart.)

St. Patrick's Day - another excuse to get wasted on island!

2010-03-16T11:00:00.000+12:00

Ah, yes... Saint Patrick's Day - next to Cinco de Mayo and Oktoberfest, another excuse to throw a party and get wasted!

Most times St. Patrick's Day falls on a weekday, so many parties are held the weekend before the actual day. It was celebrated at Vets' Hall in Kwaj on Sunday night... and did I get fuckin' hammered! One Irish Car Bomb (a shot of Bailey's Irish Cream and Irish whiskey depth-charged into a glass of Guinness and slammed down) too many! Wasn't hung over, but my mouth was thoroughly dehydrated in the morning. I sure was more than a quart low! :)

Somebody was already grumbling about my use of the term 'parole' and 'Kwajatraz'. Fine. I'll tone it down, but some people have no fuckin' sense of humor and/or can't figure out what biting sarcasm is without it hitting them in the face with a 2X4!

March Madness...

2010-03-10T10:22:00.000+12:00

... and no, I'm not talking about that college basketball championship! :)

Getting to the tail end of the dry and transitioning into the rainy season in Kwaj. Now we're getting intermittent rainshowers pushed by stiff trade winds from the northeast. The wind blows so strong that rain barely makes it to the ground in a drizzle, just enough to wet roads and clothes if you're caught in a rain shower. The 'roller' (the channel where community announcements are posted) has already warned residents to cut back on non-potable water use. Ebeye's run out of fuel - again! - because of shipping problems. (Not to worry for us; we have our own supply.)

Final - and yes, final! - fitting for my dentures today at the dental hobby shop; from there the moulds taken of my gums will be transformed into a new set of upper and lower dentures in about 6-8 weeks. There's no in-house capability of making dentures on island; so everything gets done in Honolulu or another lab stateside. (Teeth by tomorrow...? You gotta be fucking kidding me!) I'll be glad when I can chew food regularly and not have to cut things into tiny little pieces or resort to soft foods! (And not get funny looks or thoughts of the 'tootless wonder!' here on island.)

Bowled my personal best game this season last night, a 126. (Most times, I'm lucky if I break 70-80.) And almost zorched my microwave oven over the weekend when I nuked a package of instant noodles, not realizing the paper lid had an alumimum foil backing. Needless to say the container caught fire inside the oven, but I managed to snuff it out without setting off the smoke detector in my BQ (which are wired to the fire department). Took some time cleaning out the oven and airing out the stench of burnt styrofoam, but the oven is still working fine. I guess God really does take good care of fools and drunks! :)

More Kwaj-speak!

2010-02-26T14:50:00.000+12:00

We live on island constantly referring to acronyms, and there's no shortage of 'em here. Following are the most commonly used on Kwaj and Roi:

AAFES - Army and Air Force Exchange Service

AFRTS - Armed Forces Radio and Television Service

AFN - American Forces Network

ALCOR - ARPA-Lincoln [Labs] C-Band Radar

ALTAIR - ARPA Lonf Range Tracking and Instrumentation Radar

ARPA - [Defense] Advanced Research Projects Agency

ATI - Air Transport International, LLC

CDC - Child Development Center

COMSEC - Communications Security

CONUS - Continental United States

DA - Department of the Army

DCSOPS - Deputy Chief of Staff for Operations ('dess-ops')

DCSLOG - Deputy Chief of Staff for Logistics ('dess-log')

DoD - Department of Defense

DOE - Department of Energy

DeCA - Defense Commissary Agency

EOD - Explosive Ordnance Disposal

ES&H - Environmental Safety and Health

GRMI - Grandfathered RMI (employee) - RMI nationals on the job prior to October 26, 1986, when the Compact of Free Association was signed. They get better pay and benefits than non-grandfathered RMI employees.

GSK - General Stores Kwajalein

KMCC - Kwajalein Mission Control Center

MMW - Millimeter Wave Radar

NIPRNET - Non-Secure Internet Protocol Router Network ('nipper-net')

OPSEC - Operations Security

RADOT - Recording Automatic Digital Optical Tracker

RMI - Republic of the Marshall Islands

ROCC - Roi-Namur Operations Control Center

RTS - Reagan Test Site

RUMINT - Rumor Intelligence (aka the Coconut Telegraph)

SATCOM - Satellite Communications

SBM - Small Boat Marina

SIPRNET - Secure Internet Protocol Router ('sipper-net')

TRADEX - Target Resolution and Discrimination Experiment (Radar)

Weekend in isolation...

2010-02-19T13:52:00.000+12:00

The natives will be getting restless this weekend... while the DS3 communications link stateside is down for repairs, we're back in the proverbial stone age! Here's the text of the outage notice:

All, I have been informed that the outage will be from Noon on Saturday to 5am Monday.

The following on island services will be affected during the DS3 outage on Feb 20th and 21st.

Commercial Telephone: Limited in-dial and out-dial services will be available for the duration of this service interruption.

Television: Television will be replayed with currently recorded material until we come out of the outage and can go back to a live feed.

Internet: There will be no Business (.mil) or community (.com) Internet services available for the duration of this service interruption. Automated Teller Machine (ATM) and Community Bank services will also be un-available for the duration of this service interruption.

Video Teleconferencing: There will be no Video Teleconferencing services available for the duration of this service interruption.

Mission Data: All mission data service riding the DS-3 will be un-available for the duration of this service interruption.

Thank you for your patience!

Patience, my ass... when the going gets tough, the tough go drinking! Luckily, I have a tab at Vets' Hall, but will remember to get cash Friday night before the outage.

President's Day weekend...

2010-02-13T15:18:00.000+12:00

Counting the minutes to pau hana and a long weekend... my hand's already developing a twitch for a cold brewski or three or four at Vet's Hall. C-17 mail plane delayed until Sunday - hopefully the post office will be open for package delivery! Expecting some stuff on the C-17 or the ATI flight on Tuesday.

Gotta go through my new room and either re-arrange, pack or throw out stuff from the move - right now the room looks like a small thermonuclear device went off in there! Then take a few minutes late on Tuesday to clean up the problem spots found in the housing pre-inspection from my old BQ before submitting to a final inspection Wednesday.

Kwaj-speak

2010-02-12T12:56:00.000+12:00

Like any military installation worldwide, each location has its own slang and jargon that's only understood by those who currently are or were formerly stationed at a specific location. Kwajalein is no exception. Here are some Kwaj-specific terms described:

Bagger: A commuter who works on Roi but lives on Kwajalein.

BQ : Bachelor Quarters. On Kwajalein, these are named Coral, Ocean, Palm, Reef, Sands, Shell, Surf and Tropics. On Roi-Namur, they are Ajax, Apache, Nike, Ralik, Ratak, Spartan, and Zeus.

Crossing the Runway: A major safety and security violation here on Kwaj or Roi. Violators are almost guaranteed to earn a window or aisle seat (see below) on the next plane out.

DCCB: Defense Central Control Building, building 1500 on the far west end of the island. Originally an abandoned missile defense testing site, it is now used as the excess property warehouse. One of the few places where there is an elevator on island.

Dental Hobby Shop: The Kwajalein Dental Clinic.

DSC: Dock Security Checkpoint. Entry point for all personnel arriving by ferry from Ebeye to Kwaj and from Ennubirr (Third Island) to Roi-Namur.

Gimbel’s: Original name for the PX on Roi-Namur. The original Gimbel’s department store in New York City went out of business years ago.

Holmberg Fairways: Official name for the nine-hole Kwajalein Golf Course. Rabid Kwaj golfers call the nine-hole golf course on Roi-Namur the ‘Kwaj back nine’ and vice versa.

Island Fluff: A dependent wife or husband living on Kwajalein. Some 'fluff' do work casual hire part-time positions on the island.

Kwaj: Short for Kwajalein; island residents rarely refer to it by its full name. Residents are sometimes referred to as ‘Kwaj Kats’.

Kwaj Five-O: Kwajalein Police Department.

Kwaj Kid: Dependent children of Kwajalein workers.

Macy’s: Original name for the Post Exchange (PX), originally known as ‘Macy’s of the Marshalls’.

Macy’s West: Annex to the PX, where electronics, housewares and sporting goods are sold.

Meckatraz - Meck Island within Kwajalein Atoll, where the launch sites are located.
Medical Hobby Shop: The Kwajalein Hospital.

Micronesian Handicrafts Shop: Store operated by the Yokwe Yuk Women’s Club specializing in the sale of handicrafts made in Micronesia. Also known as the ‘Mic (‘mike’) Shop’.

MSD: Marshallese Shopping Day. Saturdays are when shopping privileges are granted to non-resident Marshallese workers who commute to Ebeye and Third Island daily. They are limited to no more than $250 per person per day, no liquor or cigarettes.

Ocean View Club: Social facility on Kwajalein, also known as the ‘Snake Pit’.

PDR: Pacific Dining Room. Official name for the base dining facility on Kwajalein, also called Café Pacific.

PDR Purge: That ominous rumbling in your stomach and intestines that sometimes occurs shortly after a meal at our wonderful chow hall... followed by a mad dash to the nearest restroom!

Roi: Short for Roi-Namur Island; just like Kwaj, the island is rarely referred to by its full name. Originally Roi and Namur were separate islands connected by a causeway; after World War II the causeway was filled in, connecting the two islands into one.

Roi Rat: Resident of Roi-Namur. A title boasted with pride by the residents of the island.

Surfway: Commissary (supermarket) on Kwajalein. It was originally named ‘Safeway’ until the stateside Safeway supermarket chain found out and forced a name change.

Ten-Ten: Original name for what is now the AAFES Shoppette. Referred to its original hours of operation (10 am to 10 pm). Also the building number for Reagan Test Site headquarters, simply known as Range Command.

USAKA: U.S. Army Kwajalein Atoll, pronounced ‘you-sacka’.

Window or an Aisle Seat: The choice one gets when hurriedly outprocessing Kwajalein, mainly for serious safety, disciplinary or security violations that incur an immediate bar from the island.

It's an ever-growing list... as I find more I'll post 'em!

Stupor Bowl in Paradise

2010-02-09T10:50:00.000+12:00

Football season's over and done with... and there is much rejoicing and reveling and wanton drunken debauchery on Bourbon Street as the New Orleans Saints finally proved they're no longer the Aint's. Mardi Gras just got started a week early, is all!

Here in this idyllic tropical paradise in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere, there were many Super Bowl watch parties on island - none quite as popular as the one held at Vets' Hall. AFN transmitted the game live with all the commercials - the most important part of the Big Game! - removed and replaced by the usual inane military public service announcements, greetings from the President and the Secretary of Defense and empty, contrived 'thank you for serving' platitudes by players filmed on Super Bowl Media Day the week before. (For you silly-vilians reading this humble blog, AFN receives programming for free from the major television and cable networks; no commercial advertising is permitted. To fill in the space where commercials are inserted are the ubiquitous military public service affairs announcements. They're dull and boring, nothing much has changed since I used to watch AFN in Spangdahlem 25 years ago - just a little better production values!)

I wouldn't be surprised to see a bootleg DVD floating around the island before long filled with commercials! After all, a constant underground trade in bootleg film, music and TV from stateside, not to mention porn!

Super Sunday was actually 11 am Monday morning here on Kwaj. Plenty of pupus served - you might get funny looks around here if you call 'em by the haole names of snacks and hors d'oeuvres - and lots of beer and shots were flowing throughout the game. Yours truly made a dip and cheese ball made with BaconSalt. products, namely BaconSalt and bacon buttermilk ranch dressing. Good reviews - and no one died from my cooking! You can't go wrong with having a good time at the Vets' Hall!

The last of my furnishings are out and I've finally vacated my old BQ; all that's left is just to clean up the old room and submit to an exit inspection on Thursday and turn in the key. On the other hand, my TV reception in the new BQ sucks big green weenies! It's getting fixed, though my TV set suffers occasional stupid attacks because it can't lock on to a decent TV signal and quits working after a few minutes.

FTG-06 a success!

2010-02-01T19:28:00.000+12:00

After many delays, the Lockheed LV-2 launch vehicle was launched from Meck Island, about 25 miles north of Kwaj. All the mission people and Kwaj residents are celebrating, even though one component failed. Here's the news release:

VANDENBERG AIR FORCE BASE, Calif. -- The Missile Defense Agency conducted a flight test today of the Ground-Based Midcourse Defense System.

A target missile was successfully launched at approximately 3:40 p.m. PST [11:40 am Monday in Kwaj].from the U.S. Army's Reagan Test Site at Kwajalein Atoll in the Republic of the Marshall Islands. Approximately six minutes later, a Ground-Based Interceptor was successfully launched from Vandenberg Air Force Base, Calif. Both the target missile and Ground-Based Interceptor performed nominally after launch. However, the Sea-Based X-band radar did not perform as expected.

Program officials will conduct an extensive investigation to determine the cause of the failure to intercept.

Waited a little while for the launch at North Point but got tired of waiting, so went back to continue schlepping the remaining items from the old BQ to the new BQ. It ain't gonna do itself, ya know...

Moving day...

2010-01-29T16:17:00.000+12:00

I've got three weeks from last Saturday (when I took possession of Sands 205) to vacate Tropics 108. About halfway done moving stuff out one BQ room, schlepping it the 100-150 yards and a flight of stairs to my new room. Rented a pickup truck and enlisted the help of a friend on island to help me schlep the heavy items (my personal fridge and microwave oven and cart., plus some other things. I've set a goal to finish moving out and cleaning out by next weekend so I can turn in the key and finish the outgoing inspection of the old BQ room.

Pictures coming once I rearrange and sort through all the shit I call my own. I sure hope they have another island-wide yard sale... it's time to get rid of stuff I don't need.

The Coconut Telegraph and other things...

2010-01-26T16:18:00.000+12:00

Sometimes the most accurate news on the island comes from the world-infamous Kwajalein Coconut Telegraph (not to be confused with the community e-newsletter The Coconut Wire published by Community Activities). Unfortunately the news caused some serious agita with the security folks the other day.

Because of the nature of the work we do, we're prime targets for foreign intelligence gathering. So, operations security (OPSEC) and various other flavors of -SEC acronyms (COMSEC, INFOSEC, PERSEC, and so on) are constantly reminded to us ad nauseam.

Kwaj is also a convenient refueling stop for some military aircraft that are unable to refuel in the air. So when a C-32A (the military version of the Boeing 757) stopped in for a scheduled 'gas and go' it did not take very long for details of who was on board the aircraft to spread throughout the island and broadcast on the local Ebeye radio station. Since it's no secret anymore, it was Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who cut short a tour of Asia on getting the news of the Haiti earthquake. She didn't get off the plane for such a short fuel stop, but needless to say, security officials on island had a conniption fit, and rightly so. The base newspaper and official email communications have been constantly reminding us about OPSEC. 'Nuff said on this subject. You won't find me running at the mouth (or in this blog or other social media sites) about stuff that shouldnt be openly broadcast.

On another subject, I finally took possession to the key for my new BQ room, Sands 205 on Saturday. I now have three weeks (until February 13) to vacate Tropics 108 and submit it for a housing inspection. Spent all day Sunday and Monday schlepping boxes and baskets of clothing, etc. the 100 yards or so and one flight of stairs to my new room. Did I tell you that moving sucks? (And my old man - rest in peace - would have replied 'No shit, Dick Tracy!') Moving the big stuff (fridge, microwave and cart) this coming weekend.)

First night of the bowling league tonight... and I gotta remember to fast before getting lab work done Wednesday morning!

Parole ain't getting any closer...

2010-01-20T11:10:00.000+12:00

Five months into my 'prison sentence' on Kwajatraz and I can barely see home leave on the horizon seven months away. Already got my vacation time blocked out and pricing out airfares for home leave.

Officially became a member of CAP Nevada Wing and Nellis Composite Squadron on January 10th after four years with Texas Wing and Addison Eagles Composite Squadron. In just about six months I trade in my 'railroad tracks' (captain's bars) for golden bottlecaps (major's oakleaves) on my gray CAP shoulder marks and get to wear 'farts and darts' (the double cloud and lightning bolt pattern on the service cap visor that denotes a field-grade officer). Then it's another four more years time in grade - July 2014 at the earliest - before the gold bottle cap becomes silver and I top off at my terminal grade of CAP Lt Colonel. (No 'chicken colonel' in my sights - that grade is reserved only for wing and region commanders and some national staff officers - something I'll probably never get selected for.) I can fulfill one more requirement for Level V of the CAP professional development program by staffing the Nevada Wing encampment in July (right during my home leave!) and getting selected for National Staff College next year. Everything else for Level V is completed.

Dreary long weekend - overcast and rainy. Only bright spot was the famous fish fry cooked up by one of the island residents. Things are somewhat slow at work but expected to pick up soon. Stitches came off my mouth and expecting to begin the fitting process for my new dentures in about three weeks. Begin playing on the island bowling league next week.

Back to work...

2010-01-06T22:06:00.000+12:00

Back to work after six days of rest and recuperation following major dental surgery. Stitches come off Friday, but it's still around 4-6 weeks before I can begin getting fitted for dentures. Gonna be talking funny for a little while.

Got my 12 O'Clock High DVD series collection in the mail today.Expensive - but got it at a discount - but worth it. Unlikely it'll ever make it to a mass market DVD release. I got the regular edition but will save up the bucks later on for the professional quality Criterion edition, probably after paying for my medical bills and my parole from Kwajatraz in July.

Hau'oli Makahiki Hou! (Happy New Year in Hawaiian)

2010-01-03T08:34:00.000+12:00

Sorry, I still don't know the Marshallese equivalent, yet.

Recuperating nicely from major dental surgery done on New Year's Eve, had to take a pass at the legendary New Year's partes on island - restricted to soft foods only and loaded full of antibiotics and Vicodin. Surprisingly, very little pain during the procedure (the dentist did a very good job numbing the hell outta my jaws with local anesthetic) and through post-op recovery in which my teeth were yanked in preparation for getting dentures. In about six weeks I'll get fitted for them, but they'll have to be made stateside, since Kwaj doesn't have facilities for making dentures - everything gets done up in Hono.That'll be another 4-6 weeks afterward, so by April or May I should have new choppers. It's going to cost me some money but it had to be done for my health, since I am also a diabetic (controlled by oral meds, diet and exercise). Hell of a way to lose weight too!

My upcoming move to Sands 205 (the bigger BQ room) should be done in the next couple of weeks, while they rehab and clean the BQ from the previous occupant. Already paid the $200 move fee, but gain much more square footage than my current room in Tropics BQ.

Meddi Kirijmoj! (Merry Christmas in Marshallese)

2009-12-29T13:34:00.000+12:00

Relatively quiet long Christmas weekend for some of us on island. Chow hall served its traditional Christmas spread, followed by the annual 'Stray Dog' Christmas party at the Adult Recreational Center for most of us unaccompanied folk on the island. Lots of snacks and Christmas themed movies, in the 'Bad Movie Night' tradition. First off was 'A Muppet Christmas Carol', followed by 'A Christmas Story', then 'A Tuna Christmas' and capped off by our cheesiest movie of the night... 'Santa Claus Conquers The Martians'!

I was originally going to take Saturday as one of my unpaid furlough days, but moved it up to New Year's Eve, since I am undergoing some serious dental work in preparation for getting dentures. Extraction at the dental hobby shop on New Year's Eve, and the rest of the weekend will be spent popping antibiotics and painkillers with an Ensure chaser! Gonna be expensive insurance wise but it had to be done.

Saturday evening had a few brewskis at Vet's Hall. Amazed myself with some BQ cooking for breakfast Sunday and Monday. And totally forgot about my haircut appointment at the hair salon. Shit happens...

Back to work Tuesday and Wednesday before getting tortured... at least I will have five days to recuperate before going back to work on January 6th.

Merry Christmas from the Marshall Islands!

2009-12-25T07:43:00.003+12:00

CHRISTMAS DREAM

Watch me now, here I go, all I need’s a little snow!
Starts me off, sets the theme, helps me dream my Christmas dream,
Every year I dream it, hoping things will change,
An end to the crying, the shouting, the dying,
And I hope you will dream it too!
It’s Christmas, remember?
We’ve got to remember!

So, light the light, I’m home tonight,
I need you to warm me, to calm me, to love me!
To help me to dream my Christmas dream!

Crazy things, said an’ done,
Every single day but one!
Every night should, I believe,
Be the same as Christmas Eve,
Nights should all be silent,
Days should all slow down,
An end to the hurry, the noise and the worry!
And I hope you believe that too!
It’s Christmas, remember?
Does no one remember?

The whole world needs, a Christmas dream,
We need it to warm us, to calm us, to love us,
To help us to dream our Christmas dream!

(German lyrics)

Lüge dirigiert die Welt, Ehrlichkeit bringt selten Geld,
Jeder möcht' Sieger sein, wer verliert bleibt ganz allein;
Doch manch Will' ist möglich durch die Fantasie
Du stirbst um zu leben und nimmst um zu geben;
Einmal im Jahr wird alles wahr
Zu Weihnacht vergiss nicht,
Vergiss es gewiss nicht.

(Literal English translation of the German lyrics)

Mendacity turns the world and honesty seldom brings riches,
Each must be the winner, for losers stand alone;
Though for those with imagination
it’s possible to die to live and to take to give
‘cause once in the year all is truth;
So at Christmas don’t forget
don’t forget this.

The whole world needs, a Christmas dream,
We need it to warm us, to calm us, to love us,
We need it to warm us, to calm us, to love us,
We need it to warm us, to calm us, to love us,
To help us to dream our Christmas dream!

(From the original soundtrack of the Columbia Pictures film The Odessa File (1974)
Music by Andrew Lloyd Webber and lyrics by and Tim Rice with German lyrics by André Heller
Sung by Perry Como and the London Boy Singers)

A Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all of you from here in the Marshall Islands!

No longer a helicopter virgin!

2009-12-22T15:21:00.003+12:00

Finally 'busted my helicopter cherry' and got to fly in a helicopter today as part of a site audit at Illeginni Island, about 30 miles north of Kwaj. Ya never forget your first one so mine's UH-1H Huey 62-0240, owned by the Army but operated by Berry Aviation pilots.

After checking in and obtaining life preservers we boarded the helicopter and took off from Kwaj due north as the sun rose in the east. First stop was Ennylabegan (Carlos, it's WWII invasion code name and still referred to as such) where we dropped off a couple of people from the generator shop before continuing to Illeginni (pronounced 'Ille-gee-nee, with a hard 'g'). After dropping an optics engineer and myself at Illeginni, the helo continued across the lagoon to Gagan and Meck Islands before returing to pick me up on a 'quick turn' - the audit didn't take long - about 45 minutes later. Back across the lagoon to Meck, where we picked up another guy for the return trip to Kwaj. Flew over Gugeegue ('goo-jee-goo'), Ebeye then back to Kwajatraz were we landed about 8:45.

Island humor - Part I

2009-12-20T17:05:00.004+12:00

Biting satire is a way of life here in Kwajalein, and this little song rings so very true to the inmates of 'Kwajatraz':

TEN-TEN (Sung to the tune ‘Downtown’, by Petula Clark)

Where would you go after the movies were over
And they just weren’t closed? Ten-Ten!
Feeling downhearted and you wanna get carded?
There’s a place you can go - Ten-Ten!
Don’t pick up The New York Times;
We know what Wall Street’s thinking –
Sometimes it’s just slightly out of date –
Hey, someone just shot Lincoln – watching a play!
Fluorescent lights shine in the store,
You can forget all your troubles, and what you came here for…
‘Cause at – Ten-Ten!
Whether it’s small or large… Ten-Ten!
It didn’t make the barge… Ten-Ten!
Come back in a month or two!

Feeling just dandy, go buy Valentine’s candy
On the fifth of June – Ten-Ten!
Or wanna kill time, just hanging out in a line
Then there’s a place for you – Ten-Ten!
They just got in some softbound books
On snow and how to plow it –
You wanna read a magazine
But space just won’t allow it – don’t block the aisles!
They may not have fresh OJ
But they’ve got more than two thousand white fake flower leis…
‘Cause at – Ten-Ten!
They’ve got lots of comic books… Ten-Ten!
No room to stand and look… Ten-Ten!
Just buy one and hit the road now!

Wanna buy milk or something close to that ilk
And you find empty space – Ten-Ten!
You come back in a day – the empty space gone away
There’s goat cheese in its place – Ten-Ten!
Stroll back where that liquor’s kept and shelving space is ample –
Can’t buy without a Kwaj ID – what’s next, a urine sample?
Six quarts a month! They may not have bread on hand
But they’ve got lots of that dried stuff they get from Japan…
‘Cause at –Ten-Ten!
Food that was once first rate… Ten-Ten!
You can’t even carbon date… Ten-Ten!
There’ll always be some left for you!

BACKGROUND: ‘Ten-Ten’ (probably a Marshallese pidgin corruption of ‘ten-cent store’ – further research is needed to verify) was the original name for what passes for a convenience store on Kwajalein. It became the AAFES (Army and Air Force Exchange Service) Shoppette in 2008, but long time Kwaj residents still call it Ten-Ten, just like the PX and PXtra are still called ‘Macy’s’ and ‘Macy’s West’, respectively by Kwaj veterans. Inconvenient hours, lousy selection… it hasn’t changed much in years!

I don't know who composed or performed the song, or when it was first introduced in Kwaj, but if you wanna follow the tune, here's a link to the WMA file: http://65.61.15.78/kwaj/Ten%20Ten.wma .

Sorry about not posting photos to my blog entries lately...

2009-12-12T09:12:00.005+12:00

...'cause internet service here on Kwajatraz sucks giant donkey balls!!!

For such a state of the art space and missile tracking facility, you'd half expect the island to have state-of-the-art communications... Nothing could be farther from the truth. We only get very limited bandwidth off the satcom for personal internet use (on a separate network from the .mil); it's provided only as a service by the Army, and like anything that's not mission-related it gets pushed down to a MUCH lower priority.

To access the satcom gateway we rely on slower-than-molasses-in-January dial-up only in our BQ rooms and family quarters; only a limited amount of phone circuits available. We do have wireless gateways at the ARC and the AAFES snack bar area, but the transmit range was throttled back after complaints from the families and other BQs who couldn't connect from 'leeches' in the nearer BQs (Palm, Reef, Ocean and Shell) leaving their connections up 24/7.

I could schlep my laptop to the ARC and hook up to the wireless but it's a royal pain in the ass. Plus you're limited to whatever hours the ARC or the snack bar is open. If the wireless goes down don't expect it to be up quickly, especially on a weekend when no on-call IT personnel are assigned to work the public net. Like most of the inmates here on Kwajatraz, we've gotten used to the lack of creature comforts on island. And management wonders why people aren't extending their tours?

The 'coconut telegraph' (aka the Kwaj rumor mill - not to be confused with the e-newsletter put out for residents called the 'Coconut Wire') says the cable-laying ship bringing the long-awaited fiber-optic line from Guam is supposed to dock soon. And unlike official news, the rumor mill is generally accurate! Another wild-assed rumor says we might get increased bandwidth when fiber is up and running, but I think mission ops will snag most of it. I'll believe it when I see it.

Christmas is just around the corner...

2009-12-03T13:52:00.002+12:00

... and what a year 2009 has been so far! The island is abuzz with preparations for Christmas and the traditional arrival of Santa Claus on Kwaj for the kidlets on Saturday.

Another Kwaj 'kwirk': Santa Claus arrives by helicopter at the air terminal and is met by a bunch of screaming kids barely contained by their parents. Then instead of a sleigh and reindeer Santa (the guy who plays him is actually Hawaiian) is carried aboard a flatbed truck down a short parade route to Downtown Kwaj, where the island's Christmas tree is lit. It's also the signal that allows families to begin lighting up their Christmas decorations on their houses in the evenings (until midnight daily).

Back stateside, Mom is hurriedly packing up the house so the movers can pick up on the 15th. My brother flies in from Vegas and will meet up with Mom to share driving duties for the 1200 mile trip west to Vegas. (My car is being shipped.)

Hard to believe that I will probably never return to 'Wide Awake Wylie'; something that didn't even cross my mind three months ago. But the economy soured and my mother got a layoff notice after 13 years with Verizon. She did get a decent severance package and just needs a small job to tide her over for the next three years before she hits 70 and pulls on the total retirement loud handle with maximum social security benefits. So, she got an apartment in Vegas (my younger brother Jim will move in when the lease is up on his apartment in March, and I keep the address as my 'home of record'.)

The Kwaj Thanksgiving Food Orgy - ahem, Dinner!

2009-12-01T14:44:00.002+12:00

After being told about the legendary Kwaj Thanksgiving food orgy at the chow hall by all the Kwaj veterans, I finally got to experience my first.

Thursday evening after pau hana, cold ones at the Snake Pit and Bad Movie Night at the ARC. Tonight's cheesy classic: "Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death". So bad, it was worth the hootin', hollerin' and hecklin'.

To get people fired up, AAFES (Army and Air Force Exchange Service) held a 'midnight madness' sale from 11 pm Thursday to 2 am Friday (2300-0200 for those using mil time.) Like any other Thanksgiving sale, it was a veritable Mongolian clusterfuck. But it was somewhat manageable. Bought a pair of athletic shoes for half off retail and a couple of other things. Biggest sales occurred at the PXtra across the way, where big-screen LCD and plasma TVs sold out quickly.

Got in line at the chow hall just before 11 am; when the doors opened our eyes - and stomachs - were treated to a sumptuous Thanksgiving spread: peel-and eat shrimp, mussels, crab legs, ham, mahi mahi, steamship round, and of course, turkey and all the other traditional fixings, followed by a huge selection of desserts. Piggination was had by all. I only went through the slop trough once, not knowing that one could come back later that afternoon for dinner. I got filled up rather quickly the first go around.

After chow, went over to Emon Beach and did some snorkeling... slowly getting used to swimming in open water - something I haven't done in years.

Saturday was one of my unpaid furlough days, not much going on until the evening, when I went to the Vets' Hall for a few cold ones. Watched the long-delayed ATI DC-8 flight finally leave Kwaj at around 10 pm (it was sidelined with a broken engine) and a Navy C-40 land for fuel and an overnight stop. It didn't take long for the passengers on the Navy jet to find Vets' Hall. Learned how to play 'Ship, Captain and Crew' - next time I need to be prepared to buy a round, just in case!

Sunday and Monday I just kicked back and relaxed, in between cleaning my humble abode and making a batch of SPAM musubi. I think I've finally mastered the rice cooker - this batch was manageable and not the soupy glops I'd attempted before. The Foreman grill does a decent job cooking SPAM and other meats, but I really don't have that much room in my fridges. Cooking in the BQ is permitted, with restrictions - no toaster ovens, electric skillets or appliances with open heating elements (unless you hide them after use!) The musubi turned out decent, but I'll let some of my Hawaiian friends be the judge of my culinary skill.

Thanksgiving in Paradise!

2009-11-26T10:10:00.002+12:00

Finishing up the workday here at Kwajatraz before pau hana and a four-day weekend. Because of the work schedule, Thanksgiving is observed on Friday, which is Thursday back in the States. Of course, there are some peculiar 'Kwaj quirks':

I've foamed at the mouth already about the wildly varying quality of chow at the PDR, but Friday is the traditional Thanksgiving holiday meal. From what the old heads on the island told me, they pull out all the stops and bring out some pretty good eats. Here's the info, complete with smarmy descriptives for the menu items:

CAFÉ PACIFIC THANKSGIVING BUFFET: Please join us at Café Pacific for our Thanksgiving Buffet on Friday, November 27th. We will be offering an array of tantalizing entrees that will please even the most discerning tastes. Our talented chefs will be preparing an array of items including; carving station with slow roasted steamship round of beef and Virginia maple smoked ham. Steamed crab legs with drawn butter, succulent roast turkey with all the trimmings, cashew encrusted mahi-mahi, and tortellini with garlic cream sauce. Chilled seafood bar which features jumbo peel-and-eat shrimp, mussels on the half shell, smoked salmon and Cajun crawfish will also be offered. In addition, we will be serving an international cheese bar, assorted salads, fresh fruits and a variety of delicious desserts including assorted pastries, pumpkin and pecan pie. Why cook when you can come and enjoy without the cleanup? Bring the whole family. The hours of operation are as follows: Unaccompanied personnel: 11:00 a.m.-6:30 p.m.; All other residents: 1:00-6:30 p.m. Costs are: Adults $24.95; Children under twelve $11.95.
Take-out meals will not be permitted during the Thanksgiving meal unless an authorized ration request form is submitted in advance. Food Service personnel will prepare take-out meals. Menu is subject to change due to availability.

Guess I'm gonna hafta fast tonight and skip breakfast in the morning so I can partake in this bacchanalian orgy of titanic proportions. (Howzat for smarmy descriptives?)

For the combat shoppers, AAFES is open from 2300 tonight til 0200 Friday for 'Green Thursday' (Kwaj's answer to 'Black Friday'). Couple of things I'm looking to get at dirt cheap prices, if they don't run out first. The PX, PXtra and Shoppette are ready with carefully wrapped displays labeled 'do not open until 2300 26 November'.

I've got an unpaid furlough day (we have to take five days of unpaid leave by the end of January due to budget cuts) on Saturday, so that makes it a four-day weekend much like the States.

Finally, I got to the top of the list for another BQ room but the choice sucked - Surf 301. While Surf and Tropics BQs are the newest unaccompanied quarters (built about 15 years ago) they suffer from being small, with minimal closet space. The older BQs (Sands, Reef, Shell, Palm and Coral)have larger rooms and ample closet space, as they were originally designed for two-person occupancy. Ocean BQ is the oddball, with rooms that resemble suites. Turned it down, and waiting for a room in the other BQs. Surf 301 had a nice view (looking northeast towards the ocean) but it wasn't going to improve my living conditions, especially since I would have to pay $200 to move to a new room. Plus $25 to transfer your phone line. And you're on your own to move, unless you can enlist the help of others.

I'll post pictures of the Thanksgiving spread at the chow hall later.

It is the soldier, not the...

2009-11-12T09:16:00.003+12:00

... you can finish the words of the famous poem.

Yesterday, Veteran's Day was observed on the island with appropriate pomp and ceremony. There was a brief ceremony at the flagpoles on the southeast corner of the island, with speeches by dignitaries and the customary firing of three volleys and the playing of Taps. All veterans on island - including myself - were recognized in general for our past service to our nation.

Following the ceremonies, a cookout and celebration was had at the Veterans' Hall (home of American Legion Post #44 Kwajalein; there was a VFW post and the Kwajalein Shrine Club, but both clubs are inactive).

'Kwajatraz'

2009-10-29T09:03:00.002+12:00

It doesn't take very long to adopt a cynical attitude about life in general here on Kwaj; don't get me wrong - I like my job and enjoy the island life, though it doesn't take much of a stretch to quickly dub the island 'Kwajatraz'!

Why Kwajatraz? Just like that prison in San Francisco Bay from which the moniker got shamelessly borrowed, it's not easy to get off this island voluntarily, save going on a TDY (temporary duty) assignment to Hono or CONUS (Continental United States), getting 'paroled' on annual home leave, or getting released from Kwajatraz on a PCS (Permanent Change of Station). Airfares are not cheap and there's only one airline serving the island (Continental Micronesia). If you're lucky to have Space-A (space available) flight privileges (active duty or retired military, plus some government civilians), you can fly out on the ATI flight back to Hickam AFB for next to nothing.

Kwaj regulars also call Meck Island, about 20 miles north of Kwaj 'Meckatraz'. It's rarely populated except for launches of MDA (Missile Defense Agency) interceptor tests; a Kwaj Five-O and fire department detachment act as caretakers for the island when it is idle. Thus, for those unfortunates stuck with the duty, it's even lonelier at Meck.

Back in my days on active duty in the U.S. Air Force, I was proud to call myself an 'inmate' of 'Spang Quentin Federal Penitentiary', also known as Spangdahlem Air Base, Federal Republic of Germany. Having 'done time' there during the final few years of the Cold War kind of helped me prepare for life on Kwaj. And explaining the whole situation can be difficult to comprehend for an outsider who's never been in the military - 'it's a Kwaj thing... you wouldn't understand!' Which is why some never get fully adjusted to island life.

It's not logical... it's Kwajical! (also known as Kwajalein T-shirts)

2009-10-23T05:06:00.003+12:00

Since our work dress here on island consists mostly of BDUs (Beach Dress Utilities - we may live on a military installation but there are so few uniformed active duty personnel) a popular item of clothing in our mostly balmy beach climate are T-shirts, polo or Hawaiian shirts with walking or board shorts and sandals or athletic shoes. Recently, the BX opened a dedicated Kwajalein-themed souvenir shop called 'Kwaj Korner', where one can buy Kwajalein-themed T-shirts, cups, mugs and other items.

Popular are the famous Kwaj T-shirts - granted, the selection once stocked at Macy's (when KRS ran retail services) was more varied, but it's a start. Some have relatively conservative and generic designs; others celebrate the laid-back island life.

One new T-shirt features a popular saying on Kwaj - "it's not logical, it's Kwajical!", a subtle dig at some of the sometimes bizarre decisions made by island management. I won't go into specifics; complaining and grumbling is quite natural and is run as an Olympic sport here - management starts to worry when the natives stop complaining... the threat of (virtual) cannibalism has been averted more than once here!).

I'll post pics of the shirts this weekend... Kwaj may have state of the art communications equipment for missions but our public internet runs slower than molasses! (Dial-up only in our BQ rooms, a little faster wi-fi at two hot spots in 'beautiful downtown Kwajalein'!)

Getting fired up for the Columbus Day weekend!

2009-10-10T11:06:00.002+12:00

Counting the hours to pau hana and begin a long weekend of copious drinking and wanton debauchery... made you do a double-take, huh? If you don't take advantage of the many and varied activities scheduled for the long weekend, you gotta be socially maladjusted or something! Reggae on the Rock, fire department open house, the usual swimming, diving, scuba and boating, etc., etc. and so forth!

Back up to number 2 on the BQ waitlist... some larger BQs are opening up next month as some PCS out of Kwaj.

It's beginning to look like home...

2009-09-27T21:29:00.002+12:00

Never thought I'd see the end of it but I finally have everything unpacked and furniture rearranged to my liking. Granted, the room is small (though I am on the waiting list for a larger BQ room either at Reef, Palm or Coral, whenever they open up) but it's livable.

Due to a cable on the TV transmission tower being damaged by winds the other day, some AFN channels were knocked off the air, necessitating a temporary re-arrangement of channels. Needless to say, the sports channels won out - yes, we do have some rabid sports fiends on Kwaj, and they'd have a conniption fit if their favorite team isn't broadcast! Even the news channel gets preempted to tack on another goddamn game broadcast! (Happened on Sunday, and probably on Monday.) Such is life on Kwaj... now back to my beer!

Christmas in September!

2009-09-25T13:29:00.002+12:00

Well, not quite... three more months before the actual Christmas in December! My household goods arrived on Wednesday's barge and were delivered to my BQ room yesterday. Spent the rest of the afternoon (the company gives you four hours paid time off to receive and unpack household goods), unpacking and throwing away the masses of brown wrapping paper used to protect everything during the voyage from Wylie to Kwaj.

It feels so good to sleep in your own bedding, watch crummy TV programming from AFN in your own TV (and switch over to DVDs on your own DVD player), cook stuff in your own nuker -microwave oven - put stuff in a bigger fridge, and generally enjoy a taste of the creature comforts of home - within the 750 lb unaccompanied household goods limit. I still have to finish cleaning up and rearranging stuff in my BQ room but much of it is already done.

The best thing about getting my household goods is that my personal liquor supply I put in my packout survived the trip, no bottles broken. I may have the only bottle of Weed (Jeremiah, NOT cannabis) and Lillet Blanc (for my James Bond vodka martinis) on island. And I ain't sharing! Well... if you stop by my room the bartender may offer a shot of Weed or a vodka martini, shaken, not stirred!

It may not look like much, but it'll get me around Kwaj

2009-09-21T19:48:00.002+12:00

Picked up a 'Kwaj condition' (read: fixer-upper rust bucket) bicycle this afternoon. Couldn't beat the price (free), though I'll have to spend some money restoring the bike to ridable condition. Pics to be posted later. It's a Sun, the preferred species of B. kwajaleinus, and they tend to survive the harsh Kwaj sea air better.

New bikes at the BX are in short supply, and promises of more Sun bikes 'coming on the next barge' are just that: bullshit -I'll believe it when I see it. Some will order their bikes from a very reputable bike dealer in Hono that sends bikes to Kwaj. Once I get the bike repaired, let's see how it holds up before I consider buying new.

A week without mail (and fresh produce) gets the natives restless...

2009-09-20T09:34:00.000+12:00

Without our regular AMC (Air Mobility Command) cargo flights from Hickam AFB, the Kwaj locals begin to go stir-crazy. Twice a week (on Tuesdays and Thursdays) mail and fresh produce arrives from Hono. Unfortunately, due to the aircraft breaking down because of maintenance problems, we had no mail delivery all week. To relieve the growing backlog at Hickam, an extra ATI (Air Transport International, who have the cargo contract for Kwaj) flight was dispatched this morning; an event marked by a special ‘crawl’ on AFN Kwaj’s morning TV programming announcing the post office would be open from 3-5 pm Sunday (normally they are closed) for parcel pickup.

Fresh produce is inspected by the environmental health staff at the airport as the pallets are unloaded. Those items that don’t make the cut get a one way trip to the incinerator. What’s left gets stocked at Surfway for sale that day. Since I’m not big into vegetables and fruits, I avoid Surfway on the days the fresh produce arrives. (Besides, you’re not supposed to cook in the BQs. People do it anyway, so long as they don’t use prohibited cooking equipment such as electric skillets and hot plates.)

Expecting to see a veritable zoo at the post office window at 3 pm today…

Shortages… get used to them…

2009-09-18T05:20:00.001+12:00

Life in paradise – in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere – does have its drawbacks, namely shortages and the non-availability of food, clothing, and other necessary items one takes for granted back in the continental United States.

As I’ve mentioned in earlier blog entries, AAFES (Army and Air Force Exchange Service) is the only game in town; prior to mid-2008 Kwajalein Range Services (KRS – my employer) ran the PX (then known as ‘Macy’s’), the PXtra (then known as ‘Macy’s West’) and the Shoppette (then known as ‘Ten-Ten’). KRS still runs the Surfway grocery store, what in any other military installation would be called the commissary.

AAFES Kwajalein is probably one of the smallest and most remote exchanges in the worldwide AAFES system, dependent on replenishment of goods every couple of weeks from the barge. Certain higher-demand or perishable items such as fruits and vegetables are flown in from Honolulu on the Tuesday ATI cargo flight from Hickam, along with mail. Even some items will arrive on the Continental ‘Island Hopper’ (flight 956 to Hono and 957 to Guam). Much of the AAFES items are shipped from the Korea Overseas Distribution Center, and then are shipped by barge via Guam to Kwaj. Items only stocked stateside go the real ‘slow boat’ route: Richmond, California, then Hono, Guam and finally Kwaj. Before being sent to their respective stores, any food items (especially frozen and perishable items) are inspected and rejected if beyond their expiration dates. Some frozen foods are good for about six months beyond their expiration/best by date.

Word of new shipments on the barge travels quickly through the ‘coconut telegraph’ – a very reliable word-of-mouth communications system – and it’s not surprising to see shoppers racing to the PX and Surfway to buy up items before they run out, because who knows when the next shipment will arrive? Hoarding around here is honed to a fine skill. The golden rule: if you see something you think you might need, buy it now! You can horse-trade for something else later.
Common items in the Class Six section (the liquor aisle) in the Shoppette such as rum, whiskey, vodka and gin sell out fast, leaving only the exotic and higher-dollar liquor items on the shelves. I ain’t drinking my James Bond vodka martini with flavored vodka… November Foxtrot Whiskey! (I’ll leave it to your filthy minds what it really means!)

Some of the Kwaj veterans have told me of the stocking pains AAFES suffered when they first opened last year. Apparently, AAFES has a general stocking level for all their stores, and failed to take into consideration the unique environment of life in Kwajalein. Example: lawn and garden tools. USAKA regulations prohibit digging anywhere on island deeper than 6 inches from the surface without a permit; unexploded ordnance still lurks below the surface. As civilian contractors overseas, we are entitled to shop on the online exchange system, or order via the store.

As was mentioned in another Kwaj blog, the operative word is ‘you get what you get, and you don’t get upset!’ Before long it’ll be time for home leave and a brief return to the land of plenty. Not in any hurry…

One month on island...

2009-09-18T05:18:00.000+12:00

After a month in Kwajalein, I’ve gotten accustomed to the routine of island life. Tuesday through Saturday it’s a very laid back work schedule; after breakfast, pick up the work bus to the technical area (the west side of the island) where I work in the configuration and data management department (C&DM, in the countless acronyms thrown around in everyday Kwaj conversation). Plenty of work to go around but unless the work is critical to a mission, no one’s in a big hurry to get it done. 11:30 rolls around and we pick up the bus back to the PDR (Café Pacific, the chow hall) for lunch, maybe pick up something at the Shoppette or the BX before returning to work by 12:30. Pau hana (Hawaiian for ‘end of the work day’) at 4:30; back on the bus or bike back to the chow hall or home to the bachelor or family quarters. Evenings are pretty much what one makes of it; many will go to the ARC (Adult Rec Center) to get on the computer or participate in other activities or attend club meetings or watch the limited TV selection on AFN.

I do miss some of the creature comforts I was accustomed to back in the States, but I’ve already learned to improvise, adapt and overcome them. I’m already starting to make new friends with my coworkers and other island residents, and that’s a big help in getting adjusted to island life. You can’t beat the spectacular sunrises on the ocean side and the sunsets lagoon side, mild nights that are relatively quiet and mostly light pollution free; I’ve seen more stars out here than your typical city evening.

Sunday I stopped by the ham shack to see if we could communicate with some in the States, and I purchased the first of my Kwaj T-shirts – one proclaiming my membership in the Kwajalein Amateur Radio Club. Later on I walked over to Emon Beach for a barbecue sponsored by one of the church groups. I was surprised to see kids playing at the nearby youth rec center and families enjoying a stroll after dark, something you don’t see back in the States these days.

Monday morning took the ferry to Ebeye to experience firsthand what some call the ‘slum of the Pacific’. After clearing the DSC (Dock Security Checkpoint) we boarded an old LCM (Landing Craft, Mechanized) for the 20 minute ride up the lagoon to Ebeye. (Yes, the Army does have its own small navy!) After docking at Ebeye pier, we were literally transported into a typical third world slum. The few vehicles on the island operate as taxis, making a clockwise circle around the island. To call for a cab, it’s as simple as flagging them down, and hop into the bed of the truck if the cab is full, making sure to grab hold of something sturdy if you’re in the truck bed. To signal a stop, rap on the cab or on the back window. Fares are ridiculously cheap; a dollar gets you anywhere on island. Even if you don’t take the cabs, it takes no more than half an hour to walk from one end of the island to the other.

Even in slum conditions, one can tell easily whether the residents are a little better off than the rest by the conditions of the houses; they vary from discarded pieces of plywood sheeting from Kwaj to decent-looking cinderblock homes. Naturally, the best house belongs to the island’s chief and his family on the south end of the island.

Because of religious and cultural norms, men visiting the island are required to wear long pants, though occasionally a Kwaj tourist doesn’t get the message and wears shorts; as long as they’re no shorter than knee length they’re not too particular, but expect some stares of disapproval. Women are required to wear skirts or dresses that fall below the knee. The Marshallese version of the Hawaiian muumuu dress is popular. If you wish to purchase or drink alcohol on Ebeye, you must purchase a yearly alcohol permit at the police station for $10; failure to do so can get you a fine.

Shopping on island is very limited; there’s about three or four stores, and prices vary widely. Nearest the docks is the Triple J shopping area, where the grocery store (called Payless) and the department store (Triple J) have a decent selection. Other than shopping for local goods that are out of stock in Kwaj, there’s not much to Ebeye; some Kwaj residents help the locals by teaching at the schools or working on projects through the local churches.

Once our excursion was completed we waited at the dock to return again to Kwaj on the LCM. Past the formalities of the DSC and we’re back to the safety of ‘Little America’ in the middle of the Pacific. Monday night watched the new Star Trek movie at the Richardson outdoor theatre.

Labor Day weekend in paradise!

2009-09-06T11:18:00.001+12:00

Three weeks on Kwajalein and the peculiar guys in the white coats carrying a straitjacket haven’t come take me away to the funny farm… must be a good sign!

My entire initial island inprocessing is done, though in some areas, it’s a product of the Department of Redundancy department. I guess it’s intended to ram it down our thick skulls. There were some times where it was a struggle to keep my eyes from glazing over and nodding off.

Compared to the hell I endured for three years in my previous job, my job on island is completely the opposite. Work is not too particularly hard, basically updating and redrawing parts for radar and communications equipment that have worn out over time and the corrosive effects of salt air. Everyone in the Configuration and Data Management department where I work gets along very well, and my boss is pretty accommodating, so long as our work gets done.

During workdays (Kwaj workdays run Tuesday through Saturday, to keep in sync with Monday through Friday in the USA) we have a ‘work bus’ service that travels the island and allows those who work in the far-flung corners of the island easy access to their duty locations from Beautiful Downtown Kwajalein. My work is about a mile or so west of downtown Kwaj; about a 30-minute walk, 15-minute bike ride or 7-10 minutes on the work bus. Should you miss the bus and have to schlep your sorry ass down Lagoon Road on foot power, simply extending your thumb out in the universal hitchhiker’s sign will get you a ride to where you’re going most times, should a passing golf cart or other official vehicle drive on by.

Got a chance to swim in the adult swimming pool the other day; it recently reopened after repainting and repairs. The pool is filled with saltwater, but cleaned and disinfected with regular chlorine treatments. (Families have their swimming pool in the residential area.) Besides swimming, it’s a good practice area for swimming laps, snorkeling or initial scuba certification. The ocean shore may be a tantalizing 100 yards to the east, but is considered off limits because of the potential danger of rip currents – the ocean bottom drops off precipitously to a depth of over 2000 feet about 200 yards from shore. A much calmer experience can be found on the lagoon side of Kwaj; three designated beaches – Emon, Camp Hamilton and Coral Sands – serve the Kwajalein community. Lesson learned – avoid going to the beach or pool during the peak period when the sun is at its highest between 11:00 am and 3:00 pm – you WILL get sunburned! (I got a little toasted around the edges but it was still uncomfortable for a couple of days.)

My household goods are currently on the barge and are expected at the end of the month. I’m on the list to swap out my current quarters in the Tropics BQ to a larger room in one of the older BQs; if it’s offered to me before my packout arrives I gotta pay $200 plus another $25 to move. Other than the first floor location (we get evacuated to higher floors in the event a typhoon or a storm surge threatens the island) my current room is fine. I will seriously consider getting some renter’s insurance just in case. Case in point: back in December a storm surge hit Roi-Namur and flooded low-lying areas, contaminating the freshwater catchment supply. Since only about 100 people (all unaccompanied, with a few married, childless couples) live on Roi it didn’t take very long for emergency water desalination plants to be flown in from Hawaii and take up the slack.

This is the rainy season on Kwajalein; everyone on island carries rain gear on hand in the unfortunate event they get caught in an ‘atoll washer’. Many keep a spare set of dry clothes in their offices. You get advance warning of an impending storm approaching, but when it rains it REALLY pours! It’s usually gone to the west (unlike the USA, weather runs from east to west on Kwaj) in about 20-30 minutes.

This weekend is the three-day Labor Day holiday weekend, observed on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. There are plenty of activities on island; deciding where to go and what to do is the big part. Planned is a sand-castle building contest on Emon Beach, along with live music, family activities and – whatthefuuuuuuu…? – a Baggo tournament. Most of the unaccompanied will probably hang out at the ‘Snake Pit’ or the Veteran’s Hall for cheap drinks and pupus. (It’s the Hawaiian word for appetizers, not a euphemism for shit, so get your mind outta the proverbial toilet!)

Now to enjoy the weekend!

First week on the island down...

2009-08-24T09:30:00.001+12:00

…and 103 weeks left before the end of my contract! (Unless I choose to extend – and that’s too early to tell!)

Jet lag finally is subsiding and I’m now getting used to ‘island time’. Not just the fact that we’re seven hours and a whole day away from my home of record in Dallas, but the leisurely pace of island life. Compared to the nearly three years of aggravation and stress in my last job, this attitude takes some time to get used to. Rule #1 – don’t expect things to get done in a hurry.

Tuesday I traded in my temporary privileges card for the K-Badge (USAKA island ID) and the CAC, without which I cannot access any of my work computers! Then went over to the Information Technology building to receive a mandatory security briefing and set up my wireless and dial-up public network internet accounts. Then back on the express bus to the other side of the island and my office.

For the first time in over ten years I actually have a private office to call my own! Most other jobs I’ve had put me in a cubicle farm or a drafter’s ‘bullpen’. Made sure to get logged in (and make sure the CAC card works!) Then begins my initial training on how things are organized in the Configuration and Data Management department. Where to find drawings on the server, how to set up a project, etc. and so forth. My coworkers are very friendly and eager to help a Kwaj newbie get his feet on the ground.

For plane spotters, you can’t get any better than this: the front door of my office building is but maybe 100 yards from the taxiway of Runway 06-24. Prevailing winds are usually from the east but most times they’re calm. Every once in a while – and it’s encouraged – we usually go outside and take a short break. Our building is windowless, so only the clock in my office gives me a clue of the time. Occasionally we’ll get a little show from aircraft taking off and landing at Kwaj – mostly C-130s, C-17s, the ‘Island Hopper’ 737-800 from Air Mike, the ATI Diesel 8 and the ‘San Antonio Sewer Pipe’ (Swearingen Metroliner) shuttle to Roi-Namur (simply called Roi by the locals). Occasionally the drone of the Roi helicopter shuttle is heard. No fence, but there is a very strict rule: no one crosses the air operations area at any time, under penalty of immediate termination and expulsion from the island. (Sarcastically, it’s usually referred to as ‘Do you want a window or an aisle seat (on the next flight out)?’ Your belongings will be following you several weeks later, and here’s the bill for your stupidity - estimated costs to be recouped is about $10,000.)

One gets used to the chow hall food – on some occasions they have good food, other times it flat out sucks. In a sense, you can consider Kwaj’s chow hall (the politically-correct military abbreviation ‘DFAC’ (pronounced ‘dee-fack’) hasn’t stuck to the dining hall). The more common abbreviation - and like any military installation there’s plenty of them to keep in your head – is PDR, for Pacific Dining Room. Even though it is free, we do have a choice and can go to the AAFES food court for Burger King, Subway, Anthony’s Pizza and Baskin-Robbins.

The rest of the week was largely uneventful, in between getting back into a work rhythm and attending mandatory newbie appointments. Finally, the end of the work week comes along and a general attitude of ‘TGIS’ (Thank God It’s Saturday!) permeates throughout the island. By quitting time (4:30 pm for me) the weekend activities are in full swing. There was a movie at the Rich (Richardson Theater), but also there was a loud party going on at the ARC (Adult Rec Center). I was invited to watch ‘Bad Movie Night’ with some of my coworkers; a double feature of Mystery Science Theater 3000. For those not familiar with MST3K (as fans of the series call it) it’s some old, sub-B caliber movie usually with cheesy plot and wooden acting, accompanied by sarcastic comments from the hosts, shown in silhouette. Snide comments from the audience are encouraged during a group showing. I was not a major fan of MST3K during its heyday a few years ago, but I got to like it… with good people bringing in potluck and drinks (BYOB) a good time was had by all.

Missed out on the GLORY TRIP ICBM test launch from Vandenberg – it finally launched at the end of the launch window at 9:01 am Pacific Time Sunday (4:01 am Monday in Kwaj). No biggie, there’s more in the future! The Kwaj ‘roller’ crawl on AFN Kwaj TV keeps track of the launch preparations and announces the launch as it happens – we have 20-30 minutes or so to get to North Point before the reentry vehicle light show over the lagoon. With no TV in my room (one is in my household goods pack out) I’m in the blind for now.

Now to do some laundry and vegetate the rest of Monday away before beginning another work week!

OK, so we’re not in the Land of Round Doorknobs anymore…

2009-08-17T20:40:00.000+12:00

Those who have served in the military overseas know what I’m talking about in the title: The continental US is usually referred to as the ‘Land of Round Doorknobs’ because most European and Asian countries use door handles instead of doorknobs or the ‘Land of the Big PX’ (Post Exchange – being an ex-zoomie, it’s the BX (Base Exchange) for me) because of the near-limitless supply of everything you can’t get overseas.

Apart from sleeping off the jet lag and getting used to where things are in relation to my dorm room (most are within easy walking distance), I’m slowly getting adjusted to island life. For some, adjusting to life in Kwaj can be very difficult; people have turned around and gotten back aboard the return ‘Island Hopper’ on the next possible opportunity, at the risk of becoming liable for recoupment of some serious relocation expenses.

Not having the opportunity to go out and drive to the nearest Walmart or Target for one-stop shopping isn’t going to happen here. AAFES (Army and Air Force Exchange Service) is the only game in town. The way ‘Beautiful Downtown Kwaj’ (an homage to Rowan and Martin’s Laugh-in – ‘Beautiful Downtown Burbank’) is arranged puts the main PX in one building, while housewares and electronic equipment are located across the street at the PXtra (old heads will remember it once called the ‘Four Seasons’ store). Across the way is the Shoppette, where food and necessary essentials and Class Six are located. (Class Six originates from the various classes of the military supply system. Class VI (Six) covers personal care items (Post Exchange items to include booze and stogies). The Surfway commissary (supermarket for youse sillyvilians) has a hit-or-miss selection of grocery items; even then, anti-competitive regulations imposed by AAFES restrict what the commissary can sell. Don’t ask, you wouldn’t begin to understand. As another former Kwaj resident related in their blog, ‘you get what you get, and you don’t get upset.’

Likewise, being in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere presents its unique supply chain problems. As the crow flies, Kwaj is approximately 2100 miles southwest of Hono (that’s what the locals call it here instead of Honolulu). Much of the supplies needed to stock the exchange and the Surfway (commissary) must be shipped in by slow boat. Only perishable produce gets the royal treatment; it gets flown in on the AMC (Air Mobility Command, sometimes disparagingly dubbed ‘Alcoholics Moving Cargo’) cargo plane. Got a favorite drink, food item, or creature comfort? ‘Fuhgeddaboudit!’ as my fellow New Yawkers will say. Either get friends or family to ship them to you (liquids and perishables are verboten) or take an expensive weekend trip to Honolulu. No FedEx, UPS or DHL overnight services; best we get is the three-time weekly ‘Island Hopper’ or AMC cargo to get Priority Mail. Even then, the two-day guarantee is not honored; average transit time is a week or so.

My humble abode for the next two years is a small, comfortable room just right for one person. The government supplies basic furnishings, other than personal items purchased on island or shipped on the household goods pack out. I’m within walking distance (about five minutes or so) from Downtown Kwaj and the Surfway. Privately owned vehicles (POVs in mil-speak) are not allowed on island; the only powered four-wheeled vehicles are government owned. Most get around either by walking or for longer distances ride bicycles. During work days a work shuttle bus takes employees over to the more far-flung corners on the western side of the island. I work in that general area.

Tuesday (Monday for youse bums back in the States) begins my formal inprocessing; I trade in my temporary privilege ID for a permanent K-badge and obtain an official Common Access Card (CAC, pronounced ‘cack’) to access Department of Defense computer assets. Then schlep over to the information technology department for the computer security briefing and OPSEC (operational security) training. Then off to the shuttle bus to my office (I now have a private office!!! Last time that happened was over 10 years ago) and later in the day have housing conduct an inspection of my furnishings to note any previous furniture damage (so I don’t get stuck with the bill when it’s time for me to get back to the States for good!).

The following week I still have some more inprocessing to attend, but details for another time. And now it’s time for a well-deserved combat nap before dinner… such is life in this idyllic paradise right smack dab in the middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere!

Kwajalein, here I come!

2009-08-14T01:04:00.011+12:00

The day is finally here and I'm checked in at the airport for the first leg of my flight. For those wanting a trip report I'll include it in this post.

DAY 1DFW-PHX American 1017 MD-83 (N477AA)
Scheduled route: PODDE3.ABI J66 EWM J4 SSO.KOOLY2 (Decoded: Dallas-Fort Worth PODDE3 standard instrument departure, Abilene transition via airway J66 to Newman, TX VORTAC, then via airway J4 to San Simon AZ VORTAC transition to Phoenix KOOLY2 instrument arrival.)

PHX-HNL US Airways 22 Boeing 757-200 (N906AW)Scheduled route: BXK2 BXK J212 DECAS BOILE RZS C1176 DINTY R576 DENNS HNL.MAGGI3 (Decoded: Phoenix Buckeye 2 departure, Buckeye transition via airway J212 to fix DECAS, then fix BOILE to San Marcus, CA VORTAC to fix DINTY via airway R576 to fix DENNS transition to Honolulu MAGGI3 arrival.)

Pretty close on my two checked bag weights: 43 lbs on one and right at 50 lbs. Took the plunge and paid for an upgrade to first class. It wasn't too ridiculously expensive; otherwise I woulda stuck it out in steerage. I've gotta make sure to request a seat change in Phoenix for the PHX-HNL flight (US Airways 22); right now my assigned seat is in 14B - a dreaded middle seat in steerage on the infamous 'Slave Ship' (a less than flattering nickname for a Boeing 757). Window or aisle preferably, if available; or if the upgrade can be swung for not too much cash I might try going on first class.Of course, gates change all the time; originally on Terminal C, gate C31, now departing at Terminal A, gate A9. Since I got here early, took the DFW Skylink monorail for a long, leisurely (but fast) trip around the airport terminals. Now to get ready for boarding...

Delayed about an hour - shortly after we pulled in out of the gate on time the aircraft's APU went 'tits up' and wouldn't start. So, the plane pulled into a vacant gate while the ground crew placarded the dead APU INOP (inoperative) and signed it off for travel. We had to get started the old fashioned way - with a starter cart!Rest of the flight was uneventful - sunny most all the way into Phoenix, with some clouds and overcast at destination. Guess I'm kinda spoiled with flying out of DFW - had to get out of one terminal (Terminal 3) then take a shuttle bus to Terminal 4 and re-clear security. My original seat was 14B (a dreaded middle!) No other 'choice' seats were available, so i said Whiskey Tango Foxtrot) and paid for the first class upgrade. Six hours in a middle seat sucks the big one!!! Now to get ready to board...Six and a half hours later, we reach the island of O'ahu in the growing twilight. Landed on HNL Runway 4R and quickly taxied to the gate. Picked up my bags and schlepped them to the hotel shuttle bus stop. Checked in, dropped off the bags in my room and had some dinner. Slept for a little while but got up again about 3:00 am to check out and get ready for the final leg of my marathon journey into Kwajalein.

DAY 2 HNL-KWA Continental Micronesia (Air Mike) 957 ('The Island Hopper') Boeing 757-824 (N25201).

Hono airport's different than many other airports in that the terminals and check in area are open to the air. As such it can get rather humid. After clearing security (the gate areas are enclosed, adding a further layer of security) I spent $45 for a President's Club day pass to take advantage of breakfast - none of the airport eateries were open.Departed on time and took off from the reef runway (HNL Runway 8R). Sharp turn to the right after takeoff to intercept the OPIHI 2 departure and then a 4-1/2 hour journey over the Pacific; no sight of any land until just before landing in Majuro, capital of the Republic of the Marshall Islands.

The Majuro airport (or as it is also known, Amata Kabua International) is built on a VERY narrow spit of land; only a seawall separates the runway from the ocean! The 737-800 practically stopped on a dime with full flaps and reverse thrust! Since there is no taxiway, the plane turned around at the end of the runway and did a ‘back taxi’ to the terminal building. Compared to most other major airports, Majuro’s terminal is a very small building. A security sweep was conducted; the left side of the passenger cabin (including myself) disembarked and walked down an airstair (you don’t see much of that anymore) to the transit lounge. Took about 20-30 minutes to complete and we reboarded the aircraft heading to the final destination – Bucholz Army Air Field, Kwajalein.

A short 45-minute flight from Majuro and we soon began to see some of the atolls just south; before long the flaps were put full down and we made the final approach into KWA. After touchdown it was a quick taxi to the terminal building.

Those of us who disembarked at Kwaj were quickly herded into the access control area, where our travel orders were collected and photos (for a temporary privileges card) taken. After a quick briefing we were let out of the access control area to wait for Kwajalein Police K-9s to sniff the baggage for contraband. I met my sponsor and a couple of fellow coworkers outside the terminal and loaded my bags inside a van (GI issue; personal vehicles are not allowed on island except for bicycles). After some lunch at Café Pacific (the chow hall), I began the first of many inprocessing tasks required of any new employee. Keys to my new dorm room in hand I finally was able to unpack the two heavy suitcases, get some things rearranged to my liking and finally get some sleep and recover from the severe case of jet lag I was experiencing! It helps to get your wristwatch set to the local time zone at your destination. Give me a few days to recover and get over the fire hose of information before I post another blog entry.
And now… zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

Single-digit midget!

2009-08-12T22:05:00.002+12:00

In about 24 hours I'll begin my journey to Kwajalein - my suitcases are packed and I'm enjoying my last bit of stateside creature comforts. Unlikely I'm going to be able to check in online, so planning to be early at the airport tomorrow.

Attended my last CAP squadron meeting for a while and finally presented my Paul E. Garber award certificate. The Garber award is for completing Level IV of the CAP senior member professional development program and completes all my requirements for promotion to the grade of Lt Colonel except for time in grade. (I still have 11 more months to go as a captain before promoting to major and then another four years as a major before Lt Col.) Most of my professional development requirements for Level V (the highest level in the senior member training program) are completed, but some I can't work on until I promote to major next year. No rush.

Bon voyage party went well last night, good time was had by all.

Three days and a wakeup!

2009-08-10T00:50:00.002+12:00

Packout day is tomorrow and the last of the 'care packages' have been sent, as well as any last-minute items that are going with me in my baggage. Just need to disconnect the TV and DVD player in my room and place it in the staging area for packout in the morning. And in another homage to my former military life, it's actually 'three days and a wake-up' - three more full days in the Dallas-Fort Worth before the travel day (the 'wake-up') to Kwajalein on Thursday.

It almost feels like it was just yesterday (yet only two months ago!) that I first received the email expressing interest in my qualifications for one of the drafter positions opening up on Kwaj, a position I applied for not expecting to make it beyond the first cut. But as they say, 'if it's for you, it's for you' - after nearly three years of emotional abuse, stress and lack of advancement opportunities in my last job, I'm looking forward to a new experience.

Now back to work... this stuff ain't packin' by itself! :)

Rocket Island

2009-08-08T11:56:00.004+12:00

The title of this blog post (click it!) links to a recent documentary by the Australian Broadcasting Corporation (ABC) done last month at Kwajalein. It's well made and shows both sides of life in the Marshall Islands - the idyllic lifestyle of Kwajalein and the endemic overcrowding and poverty in neigboring Ebeye. The ABC film crew received unprecedented access to Kwaj, and the documentary fairly shows both sides of what is considered a hot-button issue in the Marshall Islands. (Don't ask me to take sides with this issue. I'm coming in to Kwaj with an open mind. and I'm not about to bite the hand that feeds me.)

The page covers the documentary, transcript of the show and reporter's notes.

Last weekend stateside...

2009-08-07T22:18:00.003+12:00

Final weekend for getting things packed up and ready to go for the movers on Monday, any last-minute purchases that need to be made because once the movers pick up my household goods that's it... except for Priority Mail flat rate care packages.

Gonna hafta stop at the Carl's Jr. in Rockwall for a tasty burger - all we have on Kwaj for food other than the free chow at the chow hall is the AAFES food court, with Burger King, Charley's, Baskin-Robbins and Anthony's Pizza. And the American Eatery at the Dock Security Checkpoint. (At least Booger King is better than SuckDonald's! - I grew up in Miami (home of Booger King), so I'm no stranger to it.)

Rearranging my baggage so it's a little easier to schlep around; don't really want to pay for overweight luggage; stuff I definitely don't need at Kwaj right away is going in household goods.

Port call getting closer...

2009-08-05T22:01:00.002+12:00

Mailed out my 100-pound allowance of 'pro-gear' (part of my household goods shipment) yesterday. Cost me some bucks in postage but it'll be reimbursed when I complete inprocessing on island. (Made it well under the limit.) Still have some smaller packages with essentials in Priority Mail flat rate boxes that'll go out later this week.

Movers conduct the survey at 10 am this morning prior to packout on Monday. My sponsor on island got me a room in the Tropic BQ on the third floor and is working on getting the phone hookup.

Reality is finally setting in... in just a little over a week I'll be on my way to Kwajalein.

FIGMO redux...

2009-08-04T23:16:00.003+12:00

I did get my official entry authorization and travel orders yesterday. In this day and age, you gotta print out the copies yourself. So I did, and followed tradition by writing FIGMO! across the face of the first copy.

Finished packing away my 'pro gear' shipment (I'm allowed up to 100 lbs of 'professional equipment - mostly reference books and equipment - shipped ahead of household goods) - now to see how much the damage is at the post office! (I'll get reimbursed, though.)

Got in touch with my sponsor on island and he's getting me squared away as far as getting my BQ assignment, phone and other administrative stuff that will need to be taken care of once I get on Kwaj.

Wednesday the movers come in and survey the household goods and provide an estimate of shipment weight. Packout is still on Monday.

Had to relocate my 'bon voyage' party since the location I chose is closing down for good. :(

FIGMO!

2009-07-31T19:04:00.004+12:00

It's now official: packout day is August 10th and departure date is on the 13th. It's a rather convoluted routing: Dallas/Fort Worth to Phoenix on American Airlines on a 'Mad Dog'/'Skidbuggy'/'Noodle' (less than flattering nicknames for an MD-80); Phoenix to Honolulu on a 'Slave Ship' (Boeing 757-200) and on the following day after a layover, Honolulu to Kwajalein on the 'Island Hopper' (Continental Micronesia, or 'Air Mike'), flown on a 'New Generation Guppy' (Boeing 737-800).

The original trip routing had me starting in Abilene; because of a quirk in Texas geography there are actually two Wylies on the map: the unincorporated community outside Abilene and the incorporated city east of Dallas where I live. I quickly had the tickets corrected by having them drop the Abilene-DFW leg. As it is it's 43 miles door-to-door from my house to DFW Airport. It would have been a 250-mile backtrack (and possibly an extra night in Abilene) if the tickets couldn't be changed.

I should be receiving my official travel orders and entry authorization to Kwaj soon; in keeping with an old Air Force tradition you take the first copy of the travel orders and write 'FIGMO!' across the face of the sheet in big, bold letters. FIGMO! = 'F**k It, Got My Orders!' (Or for the pure of mind who are easily offended, replace the common four-letter word with 'Finally'.) The tradition also calls for the FIGMO sheet to get posted on your workstation or your dorm room door.

It's hard to believe now that the day I've been waiting for since accepting the job offer is only two weeks away!

Of GLORY TRIPs and missile tests...

2009-07-28T10:34:00.007+12:00

Kwajalein Atoll is home to the Reagan Test Site, where regular tests of Minuteman III intercontinental ballistic missiles launched from Vandenberg AFB, California occur. In the Air Force, these are known as GLORY TRIP missions, designed to test the reliability of operational Minuteman III missiles that once stood poised in underground silos with up to three reentry vehicles containing thermonuclear warheads under the northern tier states of Montana, Wyoming, Nebraska and North Dakota. (More technical info on the Minuteman III: http://www.fas.org/nuke/guide/usa/icbm/lgm-30_3.htm.)

A GLORY TRIP begins by randomly selecting an operational missile from one of the missile fields. The reentry vehicles (RVs) containing the warheads are removed and replaced with specially instrumented RVs before being shipped to Vandenberg AFB, where the missile is further modified with range safety equipment (to destroy the missile if it strays off course in flight).

A missile combat crew, usually from the base the missile was extracted, performs the actual key turn and launch from Vandenberg. Fifteen minutes or so later, the RVs streak through the sky over the lagoon at Kwajalein before impacting at a pre-designated area in the lagoon. They do make for a spectacular light show, as seen in the photo above.

A short YouTube video is available for viewing here explaining the GLORY TRIP in further detail - link only; embedding disabled by request: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChhYOO1s-nY .

There's a launch scheduled from Vandenberg on August 23; time to be announced. The exact launch time is classified; only a broad launch window is published. This is done to closely simulate to the combat crew an operational launch. If there are no delays to my PCS into Kwaj I may be able to see it.

What to take, what to leave...

2009-07-28T06:09:00.002+12:00

Going through my stuff to see what's worth taking with me to Kwaj and what's best left back in the states. Being I'm only allowed 750 lbs for household goods (plus an additional 100 lbs in 'pro gear' (most of my drafting and design tools and reference materials) at first it doesn't seem much but I doubt I'll exceed the weight limit. Anything else I need I can get shipped priority mail after I get to Kwaj or purchased on island.

Some new items I purchased based on the recommendation of my friend who's already on island, as well as from information I've gleaned from blogs and websites devoted to Kwaj life.

Not much longer to go...

2009-07-26T07:58:00.003+12:00

I contacted my 'handler' at KRS Friday to give her the heads up on my receiving medical clearance to go to Kwaj. As I also suspected, my background investigation cleared as well. I'll be getting a call from my handler on Wednesday (she's on vacation Monday and Tuesday) to obtain the details of my pack-out and travel dates. Doubtful there would be any problems but I'm requesting the following travel dates, based on the recommendation of my friend on island:

Depart Dallas/Fort Worth: Thursday, August 13 (on which airline is up to KRS; they're buying the ticket!) Hoping for Continental.

Arrive Honolulu: Thursday, August 13 (stay for a long layover)

Depart Honolulu: Friday, August 14 (on the Air Mike 'Island Hopper' - CO 957)

Arrive Kwajalein: Saturday, August 15 (after crossing the International Date Line)

Assuming the pack-out date will be a few days before departure from Dallas.

By arriving on Saturday (Friday for those back in the States), I might be able to get some inprocessing done on island and get in my BQ, then have Sunday and Monday (the days off at Kwaj) to get adjusted to the humongous time differences and some time to get my bearings around the island before starting my first official day of work on Tuesday.

I'm not going to do the same mistake I did when I PCSed to Germany in the summer of 1985. After a long flight (7+ hours) on a cramped MAC (Military Airlift Command, now Air Mobility Command, AMC) charter flight from Charleston AFB, SC to Rhein Main AB, plus about two hours on the road to Spangdahlem, stacking up jet lag and aggravating it with getting thoroughly fucked up with my new squadron mates. I paid for it the next day driving the porcelain bus, hungover and still jetlagged. To add insult to injury, Spang is at a higher latitude and the local sunset time was close to 11 p.m. So, I had no clue what the local time was and apparently I missed out beginning my inprocessing at the squadron orderly room. First sergeant was not pleased but somewhat understood.

Medical clearance received!

2009-07-24T19:41:00.002+12:00

Just received medical clearance from the Kwaj hospital to come on the island. One more inprocessing hurdle out of the way. All that's left is the background check; I wouldn't be surprised if it's already done - in this day of the wired world it probably took a couple of minutes to check wants and warrants. So, barring any other complications I should be receiving a packout and ship date soon.